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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26774440">Promise</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beomgyuisbabie/pseuds/Beomgyuisbabie'>Beomgyuisbabie</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Childhood Friends, Depression, Drinking, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends With Benefits, Healing, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining, My First Fanfic, Nightmares, Past Abuse, Pining, Romance, Smut, Students, coming to terms with sexuality, past trauma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 04:15:54</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>29,410</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26774440</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beomgyuisbabie/pseuds/Beomgyuisbabie</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The two boys gazed into each other’s eyes as they lay beneath the sheets in silence, awkwardness threatening to ruin the moment. But for some reason, it didn’t. Neither of the boys felt weird about the fact that they had just hooked up. It felt normal, somehow.</p><p>“Let’s keep doing this, no strings attached. No feelings”</p><p>“Promise?”</p><p>...</p><p>“Promise”</p><p>(Taegyu centric)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Choi Beomgyu/Kang Taehyun, Choi Soobin/Choi Yeonjun, Huening Kai/Original Female Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>165</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Nonstop</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“You there yet?” The sound of a notification drew Beomgyu’s attention to his phone as the younger had messaged him. He was supposed to meet with his friend Hueningkai, to show him around the campus of the academy. </p><p>“Yeah, I am. Where tf are you?” Beomgyu had found his way to the two dormitory buildings and was now resting on a bench waiting for Hueningkai to arrive. The younger boy had promised to be there early for once. They both knew that wasn’t going to happen. He sure was the same Kai he knew from high school.</p><p>“I’m almost there, calm down” With that last message, Beomgyu turned off his phone and sunk a bit further onto the bench he was sitting on, tightening the string in his hood around his head as he did so. His whole demeanor screaming “Go away!” to anyone passing by. And he stayed like that until Hueningkai arrived because he was afraid he’d get lost if he tried to navigate the campus on his own. Which was an unknown place for him.</p><p>“Beomgyu hyung!” Hueningkai waved at him from down the street, his fluffy brown locks bouncing up and down upon his head as he jogged towards him. His face seemed to have become more mature since the last time Beomgyu had seen him. As Hueningkai came closer Beomgyu also noticed how tall he had become. He was probably even taller than him now. Beomgyu would have to make sure that didn’t get to his head.</p><p>“Yah! You said you were gonna be here early. Do you have any idea of how long I’ve been waiting for your little ass?” To be fair he had only just gotten there a few minutes ago himself, but Kai didn’t need to know that.</p><p>“Oh shut up. Have you been to your dorm yet?” Beomgyu was a little disappointed at the response he got from the younger but decided not to provoke him further.</p><p>“No, I don’t know which building I’m supposed to be in.” He gestured toward the two buildings which stood tall behind him, casting a shadow over the street they were on.</p><p>“Have you even looked at them?” The younger boy retaliated with a tone that made it sound like he was calling him stupid. He pointed to the signs above the doors of the two buildings. The left one read “남둥” and the right one “여행”. And suddenly it made sense to him. </p><p>The school had two different dormitory buildings for men and women. And the rules for them were pretty strict. You weren’t allowed to have guests of the opposite sex enter your dorm. People had been expelled for that in the past. There were cameras in the hallways to ensure that students didn’t break these rules, and they were constantly being watched. The rules were very conservative but they didn’t bother Beomgyu too much.</p><p>“Let’s just go” Beomgyu didn’t want to give Hueningkai another chance to make him look stupid so he picked up his bag and took the lead, walking towards the left building. Hueningkai giggled a little to himself as he watched Beomgyu walk at a fast pace in front of him, clearly annoyed.</p><p>When they went through the doors to the left building they were immediately greeted with a crowd of bustling students. Most of them gathered around the huge sofa and television on the left side of the room. All of them were male. Beomgyu was definitely in the right building.</p><p>Besides the common area, the room was fitted with two elevators, a large table with lots of chairs, and a reception desk. He moved over to the receptionist to check-in. Beomgyu still had no idea what the dorms were like here. He hoped they wouldn’t be too small.</p><p>“Hi, I’d like to check-in please” He looked over at the receptionist, not wanting to make eye contact with the older woman. She had a frog-like face and a scowl resting on it. In other words, she didn’t seem to be in a good mood.</p><p>“Name” Her voice was raspy and low and made Beomgyu feel kind of uncomfortable. He wished for this encounter to be over quickly.</p><p>“Choi Beomgyu” As soon as he had answered the woman had begun writing on the computer keyboard, with unnecessary force.</p><p>“Your dorm is on the third floor. Use this to unlock the door and turn on the electricity. Do not lose it.” She held out a keycard with the number 311 on it. Beomgyu hastily took it, bowed to the woman, and uttered a small ‘Thank you’ before hurrying away from her, not wanting to be in her presence any longer.</p><p>The two boys started walking towards the elevators and pressed the button to call for one. It didn’t take long before the closest one opened its doors to let them in. Beomgyu pressed the button for the third floor after the both of them had stepped into the elevator, and it began rising. </p><p>As they stood in silence waiting for the elevator to reach its destination the younger felt the awkward tension become too much for him.</p><p>“So how was Japan?”</p><p>“It was fine, I guess..” Beomgyu fixed his gaze to the floor, but he could feel the younger’s eyes on him.</p><p>“Did something happen?” Hueningkai had adopted a soft and worried tone of voice, very different from the playfully teasing one he had had earlier. But before Beomgyu got the chance to answer, the bell rang. Signaling that they had reached the third floor.</p><p>Beomgyu seized this opportunity to avoid answering the question and exited the elevator at a fast pace in search of his dorm room. He looked at the keycard he held in his hand, number 311. The corridor they found themselves in continued to his right, the numbers on the doors increasing as they went. </p><p>When they finally reached the door with a 311 on it, Beomgyu placed the keycard into the electric lock. The door clicked and he opened it. Directly behind the door was a small entry space where they could take their shoes off, to the left a bathroom, and straight forward a small space leading to a slightly bigger room. It had two beds, two desks, a window with a balcony, and two wardrobes. He was clearly supposed to have a roommate. </p><p>“I guess your roommate hasn’t gotten here yet” Kai said, stating the obvious, looking around the empty double dorm.</p><p>“Yeah, I hope he’s nice” Beomgyu sat his bag down on one of the beds and started to unpack.</p><p>The two boys stayed in silence for a while. Beomgyu unpacking and organizing his stuff, and Hueningkai just sitting there. Something bothered him, he tried to shake the worry out of his head. But he found himself unable to.</p><p>“Beomgyu hyung?” The younger boy made sure to sound as gentle as he possibly could, sensing that whatever had happened to his friend was not something good.</p><p>“I don’t want to talk about it, Kai. I was in a shitty relationship with a guy, okay?” Beomgyu had paused what he was doing to speak but didn’t bother to turn around to face the other who was now sitting on the bed from across him.</p><p>“I’m sorry, I won’t pry” Hueningkai hurried to apologize, not wanting to bother Beomgyu anymore than he already had. Instead, he settled on watching the sun shining through the window. It had already become quite late in the afternoon. He would have to leave soon and get ready for the first day of classes.</p><p> </p><p>__________</p><p> </p><p>The sun was shining through the window where Beomgyu sat at the back of the classroom. He had gone to class early in order to not be late for his first day, which resulted in him arriving in an almost completely empty classroom. On the bright side, he got to choose where he wanted to sit.</p><p>As the minutes passed more and more students started filling the classroom, occupying the chairs that were left. A fairly average height guy was walking towards Beomgyu, or the chair beside him. His black curly hair laying softly on his head, framing his face nicely.</p><p>“Is this place taken?” The guy asked and gestured towards the empty chair beside Beomgyu.</p><p>“No go ahead” He answered with a smile. The boy started to unload his stuff onto the table and sat down. </p><p>“My name is Wooyoung, it’s nice to meet you,” he said while extending his hand and smiling brightly. Beomgyu took it.</p><p>“I’m Beomgyu. It’s nice to meet you too”  </p><p> </p><p>__________</p><p> </p><p>The bell rang, signaling the end of class and to Hueningkai’s delight, lunch. He started putting away his books into his bag and stood up with the rest of his class. He had to hurry to reach Beomgyu’s English classroom, they had agreed to meet up and eat together. Mostly because Beomgyu still didn’t know the exact layout of the campus and would probably get lost if Kai didn’t guide him to the cafeteria.</p><p>He walked towards the door at a fast pace, getting caught behind the rest of the class. When he eventually reached the door he quickly reached for the handle and stopped it from closing before him. But the lower part of his body was faster than his arm. He accidentally shoved his foot under the door, stopping it from opening further. Which resulted in him walking into the door, face first.</p><p>He looked around and to his relief found that he was the only one left in the classroom, sparing him from any embarrassment. The rest of his class must have had the same rush to get to lunch as he did. Kai left the classroom and sat off at a fast pace to get to Beomgyu, and not be late this time.</p><p> </p><p>__________</p><p> </p><p>“I want this done by next tuesday!” The professor said, earning groans and whines from the students. ‘This’ was a 2000 word essay on why the students chose the majors they did. And it had to be completely in English. Beomgyu didn’t mind the chance to talk about his major as much as he’d want, it was the English part he disliked. He wasn’t bad at English, however he always seemed to use the same vocabulary when writing essays and that used to have a negative affect on his grade.</p><p>The professor continued talking about grading criteria, but went quiet when a student came running in the corridor, visible through the windows of the classroom. The student halted when he noticed Beomgyu’s class and their professor staring at him. He was visibly heaving for breath.</p><p>The boy Beomgyu knew as Hueningkai backed out of sight and gave Beomgyu a look of apology, and slight mortification. The class followed Kai with their eyes, and when he disappeared from everyone’s view they instead looked at their professor. Expecting him to continue with the lesson. But when he was about to begin speaking again, the bell rang.</p><p>“Don’t forget, next tuesday!” The professor reminded the class one last time before everyone started packing up their stuff. Beomgyu gathered his books and walked out of the classroom with the rest of the students. Right as he exited through the door Hueningkai grabbed him and pulled him out of the line of bustling students.</p><p>“Come on, they’re waiting for us.” Kai said, while still holding Beomgyu’s arm.</p><p>“Who’s ‘they’?” Beomgyu asked, not aware that the two of them weren’t going to be alone for lunch.</p><p>“Oh, just my friends. They’re really nice. I wanted to introduce you to them” Kai replied, smiling at him with a mischievous glint in his eyes. Beomgyu nodded, silently thanking Kai for being such a good friend. Without him he probably would have no one to hang out with. Since Beomgyu was starting at the academy as a junior and not a freshman it could be quite hard to make friends. Especially considering the fact that most people were already a part of a friend group. </p><p>After having put their books in their respective lockers, the two boys made their way through the corridors towards the west cafeteria. Which was a fairly new addition to the school, built only a few years back. The west cafeteria was much more modern and clean looking compared to the east cafeteria, which was built in the 1950s.</p><p>They arrived in the cafeteria and got in line for the food. They both chose from the menu and used their lunch cards to pay. Kai then walked off towards a round table where two guys were sitting. Beomgyu followed him.</p><p>As they came closer to the pair, Beomgyu noticed that one of the boys had his head stuck to the other’s neck. While the other’s face was flushed red and said something to the other that was inaudible to Beomgyu. Both of them sported pastel coloured hair, one blue and the other pink. When Beomgyu and Kai sat down next to them the pink haired boy finally retracted from the blue haired boy’s neck.</p><p>“You two seem very close,” Beomgyu said with a hint in his voice, earning a chuckle from the pair.</p><p>“You’re Beomgyu, right?” the pink haired boy asked. Beomgyu nodded shortly.</p><p>“I’m Yeonjun, nice to meet you!” he said and extended his arm and they shook hands. At this point the other boy had gathered himself and his face was back to a fair complexion. He also held out his hand for Beomgyu to take, and he did.</p><p>“I’m Soobin” he said with a smile, and they released the grip around each other's hands.</p><p>“What happened to your face, Huening?” Yeonjun was looking at Hueningkai with a questioning expression. Soobin and Beomgyu also directed their eyes towards their younger friend. </p><p>“Oh it… it’s uh.. It’s nothing,” Kai tried to hide the red mark on his face that appeared after he face palmed the door of his classroom. “When is Taehyun getting here?” He asked in an attempt to divert the attention from him to something else.</p><p>“He said he had to stay a bit after class but he should be here soon,” Soobin answered, helping Kai escape from further questioning of the mysterious red mark upon his face. But to no avail, Yeonjun was set on finding out what happened.</p><p>Beomgyu started tuning out the conversation, not interested in causing embarrassment for his friend. Or rather, finding it unnecessary to. Yeonjun was doing a good job on his own, ignoring Soobin’s attempts to stop him. His attention was directed elsewhere, towards a boy nearing their table.</p><p>In all seriousness, saying that this guy was anything other than utterly beautiful was a total lie. He was one of the most handsome people Beomgyu had ever seen. If not the most. He had shiny blonde hair and the features of his face made him look like a fairy. His eyes were deep, almost magically deep. Drawing Beomgyu’s gaze towards them, not letting go.</p><p>“Sorry I’m late, my professor made me sit and listen to him ramble on about the importance of showing up on time,” the blonde haired boy said. “I don’t believe we’ve met, I’m Taehyun” he continued while looking at Beomgyu. They shared eye contact for a brief moment.</p><p>“I’m Beomgyu” he replied, he found it very hard to focus on the things said around him after that point. Still mesmerized by the fairy-like appearance of Taehyun. Soon after however, Hueningkai hit him on the arm while laughing. Which effectively snapped him out of his trance.</p><p>“Do you remember when we tricked Mrs. Kim into giving us the answers for a test in high school?” Kai said while laughing.</p><p>“Yeah, the whole class was laughing then, but she had no idea why. It was hilarious” Beomgyu answered chuckling slightly, reminiscing about his high school days with Hueningkai. </p><p>“You two went to the same high school? How come you didn’t start here last year then?” Taehyun asked.</p><p>“After graduating I left Korea to study abroad in Japan. I hadn’t originally planned on returning before finishing my education there. However something came up so I transferred here.” Beomgyu replied</p><p>Their lunch period would soon end, but before heading off to their respective classes Beomgyu exchanged numbers with the rest of the group. Having agreed to come with Soobin and Yeonjun to get coffee after class.</p><p>__________</p><p> </p><p>Hurrying past the crowd of male students filling the entrance to his dorm building, avoiding the frog-faced woman at the receptionist desk. Beomgyu reached the elevators and pressed the button for the third floor and made his way towards his dorm after having arrived. He opened the door with his keycard and strode forward to his bed. He laid his bag on top and reached for his wallet. Before leaving he looked around the room to see if his roommate might be there, but once again it was empty. So he left the room, making sure the door locked behind him.</p><p>He promised himself to ask about Taehyun when he was out with Yeonjun and Soobin. He could still picture those captivating eyes clearly. He wanted to know more.</p><p>__________</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Illusion</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The cool September air hit Soobin’s face as he stepped outside of the dormitory building, closely followed by his boyfriend Yeonjun. Soobin stretched the sleeves of his sweater down past his hands, which Yeonjun took as a signal. He removed one side of his coat and wrapped it around Soobin, gesturing for him to put his arm through the coat sleeve. As the pair were warming each other up underneath the coat the doors opened behind them.</p><p>“Are you guys ready?” they turned around in their cucoon to face Beomgyu.</p><p>“Yeah, let’s go” </p><p>The three of them were going to a coffee shop close by the campus. Yeonjun had suggested all of them get together after classes but since Kai and Taehyun had a longer day than the rest of them, they went alone.</p><p>The coffee shop was located about five minutes from the school. So most of the students went there in the mornings to get coffee before classes started. In the evenings however the shop was less crowded and had a comforting aura around it.</p><p>There were fairy lights and other decorations set up all around the shop windows and tables. All of the lights gave off a reddish, pinkish kind of glow which made the whole venue look like something out of a fairytale.</p><p>When the three of them got there they went inside and removed their coats, due to the drastic change in temperature from the outside. The group walked up to the cashier and ordered three lattes. They got a beeper and chose a table near the windows to sit at.</p><p>“So, how did you two meet?” Looking to start a conversation, Beomgyu asked something he’d wondered since earlier that day.</p><p>“We met at a party in freshman year” Soobin stated</p><p>“You were so drunk by the end of that night!” Yeonjun said with a laugh in his voice, looking at Soobin.</p><p>“I was not!” </p><p>“You couldn’t even walk, I had to carry you all the way to your dorm!” Yeonjun retaliated, now laughing. “And you’re not exactly light you know”</p><p>Soobin sighed, and turned his head to face Beomgyu who was smiling, watching the couple bickering. “So when did you and Kai meet? I take it, you're old friends?”</p><p>“Yeah, we met when we were five. We grew up in the same neighbourhood and went to the same high school. He’s always been by my side, and I’m really glad we stayed in touch after graduation”</p><p>“Oh right, you studied abroad in Japan freshman year. Why did you transfer here?” Soobin asked</p><p>“I was in a serious relationship with a guy, it ended pretty badly and I didn’t want to stay there. So I transferred here to MOA academy” Beomgyu felt a sting in his chest while explaining to the pair. He unconsciously started biting his fingernails. ‘It’s fine, at least you’re free of him now’ he thought to himself.</p><p>”I fuckin’ knew it! You are gay! Or you at least like men” Yeonjun exclaimed jumping up from his seat, a little too loudly. People around them turned to look at the group. Yeonjun sat down again awkwardly, avoiding people’s glances.</p><p>“Yes I am gay, but you don’t have to shout” Beomgyu chuckled while looking at Yeonjun, who was giving him an apologetic look.</p><p>Suddenly the beeper rang, startling all three of them who seemed to have forgotten that they were waiting for coffee. Soobin stood up from his seat and grabbed the beeper, going to get their order.</p><p>“So...Is Taehyun also a junior?” Yeonjun seemed to have recovered from the embarrassment from earlier, and at Beomgyu’s question his face lit up at the chance to talk again.</p><p>“Yeah, he’s Kai’s roommate. They’ve been roommates since freshman year actually” Yeonjun answered. “We met him right after Soobin adopted Heuning”</p><p>“Adopted?” Beomgyu asked, confused.</p><p>“It’s best if we don’t question Soobin, he’s like that,” Yeonjun said with a strange expression upon his face. “He loves Kai a little too much to be honest” he turned his head towards the approaching Soobin with a tray in his hands, balancing three cups on it.</p><p>“It’s nice now that you’ve joined the friend group, before it was just 2 against 2. Now the gays overpower with 3 against 2” Yeonjun said with an evil grin. Soobin placed the tray on the table and hit Yeonjun’s shoulder lightly.</p><p>“Will you drop that already, it’s been a year” he said, sitting down in his chair again.</p><p>“Then Taehyun is straight?”</p><p>“Unfortunately, he can go on and on about girls. Describing how pretty and nice they are” Yeonjun said. “It’s annoying really” Beomgyu’s heart sank a little. What had he expected anyways. Of course he was straight, all pretty and handsome boys are straight. The only ones he’s left with are the assholes.</p><p>__________</p><p> </p><p>Exhaustion had taken over him as he stood leaned against the wall of the elevator. He had just enough energy to press the button for the third floor and make his way back to his dorm, number 11.</p><p>He unlocked the door and went inside, not bothering to remove his coat. He strode directly for his bed and threw himself onto it, his body gladly accepting the comfort of his soft mattress. Not a second after he’d thrown himself through the air however, a startled shout reached Beomgyu’s ears. Coming from the other side of the room.</p><p>“You scared the shit out of me” Beomgyu turned around on his bed to face the source of the voice, presumably his roommate. The person in front of him had a hand pressed to his chest. He had black wavy hair and a familiar sweet face. </p><p>“Wooyoung! I had no idea you were my roommate” Beomgyu said smiling, Wooyoung removed a pair of headphones from his ears and chuckled slightly. “I was so used to being alone, sorry for startling you” </p><p>“It’s okay, don’t worry about it. I guess it kind of is my fault for not moving in when we were supposed to” Wooyoung said, smiling with his eyes. “I’ve been staying with my boyfriend for the past week”</p><p>“Oh, does he also go here?”</p><p>“No, he graduated last year” as Wooyoung was talking about his boyfriend, his face adopted a dreamy look. “He has an apartment in gangnam, and he works for a huge entertainment company” </p><p>The two boys continued talking for a while, getting to know each other. They talked about the past, where they grew up, their family, their future and their friends. But after a long day of classes and social activity, both of them were tired. </p><p> </p><p>_________</p><p> </p><p>It’s been five days since the first day of classes, and things have been moving smoothly for Taehyun. He hasn’t been too busy with homework so he’s been able to hang out with his friends. And that new guy, Beomgyu.</p><p>In fact, he was on his way to the library right now. To meet with Kai, Yeonjun, Soobin and Beomgyu for a study session. Soobin texted him and said they’d already gotten there. Which meant he was last to arrive, again.</p><p>When Taehyun entered the library he immediately spotted his friends at a round table up near the windows. As he got closer he picked up on their conversation.</p><p>“Are you gonna eat all that yourself?”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>“Can I ha—“</p><p>“—No.”</p><p>Hueningkai was trying to get a taste of Beomgyu’s sandwich. And Beomgyu was profusely denying him even the smallest of bites.</p><p>“Hey, sorry for being late again” Taehyun spoke. Gaining the attention of the group of students. </p><p>“Welcome, how’s your day?” Soobin asked, looking at Taehyun with a calm expression.</p><p>“Well, no one died.”</p><p>“Those are your standards?”  Beomgyu turned his head towards Taehyun, looking at him with questioning eyes. Taehyun shrugged and giggled, sitting down in an empty chair between Beomgyu and Yeonjun. </p><p>“So, now that everyone is officially here, shall we begin this study session?” Yeonjun inquired.</p><p>“You sound old when you speak like that,” Taehyun stated. “But then again, you are from the 20th centu—“ </p><p>“—Listen here you little brat,” Yeonjun interrupted. “If you call me old one more time, I swear i'll break your thumb”</p><p>Taehyun put his hands up in mock surrender, laughing all the while. Yeonjun pointed to his eyes and then at Taehyuns, quite harshly might I add. Signaling ‘I’m watching you’.</p><p>“Could anyone help me with this English essay? It’s supposed to be done by Tuesday” Beomgyu asked softly, trying to distract the group from any further arguments. Yeonjun agreed to help, and the others began studying as well.</p><p>“Hey by the way, why did you transfer here Beomgyu? Didn’t you study abroad?” Taehyun asked, having missed the explanation Beomgyu gave to Soobin and Yeonjun the other day.</p><p>“Oh, it’s nothing serious, I just broke up with a guy. Didn’t want to stay there” Beomgyu began scratching the skin on his thumb unconsciously.</p><p>“Wait a minute. You’re gay?” </p><p>“Uh, yeah”</p><p>“You didn’t know that?” Yeonjun asked with an obvious attitude in his voice.</p><p>“How was I supposed to know? Read his mind?” Taehyun retaliated.</p><p>“Okay can you two stop with the bitching for one second?” Soobin tried to bring some order back to the ‘study session’, and was actually successful for once.</p><p>“Sorry sweetie”</p><p>“Sorry”</p><p>Hueningkai, who had zoned out after being denied a taste of Beomgyu’s sandwich, hadn’t been listening to the conversation going on in front of him. He was going through some notes while leaning his head on his hand, and in his other hand he held a pencil. Which he was swinging back and forth, very close to his face.</p><p>Beomgyu nudged Taehyun's arm lightly, gaining his attention. He nodded over at Hueningkai who was sitting opposite of him. Taehyun noticed the situation and giggled together with Beomgyu, waiting for it to happen.</p><p>And just as expected, Kai swung the pen so drastically he accidentally hit himself on his forehead. Making him jump at the same time. Beomgyu and Taehyun started laughing, which confused the two seniors at the table. Kai on the other hand was flustered, and dove into his notes again.</p><p> </p><p>The group continued with their studying, getting done assignments and essays. And after some time they all went to the coffee shop, enjoying the evening together before everyone headed off to their respective dorms. Except for Yeonjun, who was as good as moved into Soobin’s single dorm.</p><p> </p><p>__________</p><p> </p><p>Taehyun made his way through the narrow streets, lit up with old streetlights. The road was crooked and uneven, but to him it was as familiar and welcoming as ever. He was on his way to his parents’ house for this week’s Saturday dinner with them and some other relatives.</p><p>Something he wasn’t looking forward to however was the lecturing on life choices his parents always gave him. Especially the lecture on loving relationships, specifically between men and women.</p><p>It’s not that his parents were homophobic, he actually didn’t know if they were. They hadn’t really expressed any hate towards homosexuality, they were just very conservative. They liked things a certain way, their way.</p><p>Taehyun always thought their way of thinking was wrong. But he couldn’t stop worrying. So he found himself succumbing to their opinions once again, afraid to speak his mind. Afraid of what they would think.</p><p> </p><p>__________</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Okay so um, I accidentally deleted this chapter. I originally posted it yesterday but here it is again heh</p><p>sorry, I'm clumsy okay don't hate me please</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Pretty U</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Two iced americanos please” Taehyun handed over his card to the cashier. Hueningkai and him had left their dorm together that morning, to get coffee before the first class of the day. The sun still hadn’t risen since it was still pretty early. Which meant the two boys needed a pick me up to help them wake up properly. And they opted for coffee.</p>
<p>The lady that worked at the coffee shop seemed to be in her twenties. She was a sweet looking woman with a calming presence. She smiled every time she saw one of the boys in their friend group, which was very often since they go there almost every day. Her smile was very contagious and made her look like a bunny. She squinted her eyes and showed the front of her teeth, it was actually pretty cute.</p>
<p>She handed the two finished coffees to Taehyun. He thanked her respectfully and walked over to his friend who was waiting by the door, eyeing the two. Taehyun gave one of the iced americanos to Kai and together they went outside. Walking back towards the campus in silence as they sipped at their coffees.</p>
<p>“I asked her out,” Kai blurted out suddenly.</p>
<p>“You what?”</p>
<p>“I asked out the girl who works at the coffee shop,” he repeated, explaining a bit further. </p>
<p>“What did she say then?” Taehyun hoped his friend wouldn’t have brought up this topic of conversation if he hadn’t gotten a positive answer. Which would spare him from the awkward silence after having confessed to have been rejected. </p>
<p>“We’re going out on friday!” Kai beamed with happiness. He looked absolutely gleeful. Taehyun hadn’t seen him like this in a long time. He was happy for him of course, it wasn’t often his shy friend went on dates with girls he liked.</p>
<p>“That’s great, Kai!” Taehyun playfully hit him on the shoulder. He stumbled a little after Taehyun lightly hit him, but laughed it off immediately since he was in such a good mood.</p>
<p>The two boys continued walking towards their morning classes together, coffee in hand, while talking about upcoming tests and projects. Hueningkai, seeming to come down from his temporary high, took up his phone from his coat pocket. “Huh, it’s already 6:30”</p>
<p>“Wait, 6:30?!” Taehyun halted and turned hastily to face his friend. “Fuck, I’m going to be late! Again!” He tightened the straps on his bag and held tightly to the cup of coffee in his hand. Bidding his friend goodbye, he started to run. ‘I can’t be late again, someone might’ve taken my spot’ And he sprinted, driven by a longing that was unknown to him, for now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Your hair is so soft..” Soobin said in between kisses, his hand running through Yeonjun’s pink hair. They were laying on top of their bed, originally just cuddling which later turned into a makeout session.</p>
<p>“I know,” Yeonjun responded, pulling back a bit from their kiss.  “I fluffed it up just for you” he added, winking at his boyfriend. Soobin laughed and collapsed onto Yeonjun, hugging him.</p>
<p>“We should probably go get ready though,” Soobin stated, regaining a sitting position on the bed. “Or we’ll be late for class” He tried to get off the bed but Yeonjun grabbed his hand, pulling him back into his embrace.</p>
<p>“No, I’m not letting you go. It’s too early to get out of bed.” Yeonjun reasoned, an arm secured around Soobin’s tiny waist. Holding him close while preventing him from leaving the bed. Soobin tried to wiggle out of the tight hug, ending up closer to his boyfriend’s face.</p>
<p>With a last try to break free, Soobin reached over and kissed his boyfriend passionately. His plan seemed to work wonders because soon after Yeonjun’s hands loosened their hold around Soobin. Surrendering to the power the tall boy mustered, alluring only in his presence. Only for him.</p>
<p>“Fine, you win.” The two boys got out of bed and got ready for their day, together.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As Taehyun sprinted down the corridors filled with students, he remembered the first week back at the academy. More specifically, his first history lesson with Mr. Bang. Him and Beomgyu had noticed they were in the same class, and they promised each other they’d sit next to each other for the rest of the year. Because, well, the other students in their class were either boring or just straight up assholes. </p>
<p>He hoped Beomgyu hadn’t given away Taehyun’s seat to someone else, or been forced to by Mr. Bang. He really despised his other classmates, and didn’t want to sit next to any of them. They hadn’t actually done anything to make him dislike them. They just ticked him off in the wrong way.</p>
<p>He finally arrived at his classroom to find that his friend was sitting in their usual spot next to the windows, with an empty seat next to him. Taehyun smiled to himself, thankful for making it in time. He went over to Beomgyu and took the empty seat next to him.</p>
<p>“Hey,” Beomgyu started “Cutting it kind of close today are we?” He motioned towards the clock hanging above the door to the classroom. It was 6:39, which means that if he had gotten there just one minute later he’d have been late. Luckily their professor hadn’t arrived yet, so he was safe. They exchanged a few words before Mr. Bang walked in and began the history lesson.</p>
<p>“Good morning to all of you,” He spoke with a loud voice that reached the students in the back. “Today we’ll be going in depth about the history of our school” He paused for a bit to pull up a presentation on the projector. The first slide read ‘MOA Academy’ with big and bulky letters.</p>
<p>“MOA academy, or Merit of Arts Academy,” he held a long ruler in his hand, which he used to point at the board. “The school was founded on the 22nd of November 1813, by an amazingly intelligent woman named Shin Gwiyoung” when he mentioned the founder of the school his eyes drifted off towards the windows, he had a dreamy expression on his face.</p>
<p>“In the 1940s the academy became a boarding school, allowing students to live on campus. Back then the dorms served as small apartments, with kitchen supplies and other requirements in order to live here. But as you’ll all probably have noticed, there are no longer any heat appliances in your dorms,” The professor stated, which was true. </p>
<p>“Ten years later, during the drought of the summer in 1952. A student left their stove on which led to a fire. That fire went on to spread across almost the entire campus, leaving behind scorched ruins of how the academy used to look like when it was first built. Luckily there was one part of the school that managed to survive, the west wing” Mr. Bang continued to switch between the slides as he spoke, showing pictures and words associated with the topic of his lecture.</p>
<p>“After the fire, the academy closed down for 7 years in order to rebuild. Also removing all of the dangerous and potential fire starting appliances from the dorms. Some changes were also made to the west wing, which became significantly more important to preserve for the school. They added plaques around the garden of the small building, sharing the history of the place and other facts about flowers and trees that grow there.” </p>
<p>Taehyun found himself tuning out the professor’s words, growing more disinterested with each second that passed. He turned slightly towards his friend Beomgyu, who was sitting next to him. The rising sun was shining through the window, casting a soft light on Beomgyu’s face. It accentuated his side profile, which Taehyun hadn’t taken too much notice of before. But right now, he looked angelic.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>50 Shades of Gay<br/>Friday, Oct 16</p>
<p>BAMgyu<br/>“Anyone down for some uno and chill tonight?”</p>
<p>Yeonnie~<br/>“I have no idea what that is but let’s!”</p>
<p>Teahyun<br/>“I’m down”</p>
<p>Ning Ning<br/>“I can’t, I have a date ٩(^ᴗ^)۶”</p>
<p>Soobinnie<br/>“I’ll be there”</p>
<p>BAMgyu<br/>“Alright, does 6 work for everyone?”</p>
<p>Teahyun<br/>“Yeah”</p>
<p>Yeonnie~<br/>“Yup”</p>
<p>Soobinnie<br/>“Yes”</p>
<p>BAMgyu<br/>“Okay I’ll see you then”</p>
<p>Ning Ning<br/>“Wait-”<br/>“I have a date (′ʘ_ʘ‵)”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The clinking sound of bottles filled the elevator Beomgyu had just gotten into. He’d just gotten back from a convenience store nearby with a few bottles of soju. And currently, they were inside a small plastic bag provided by the cashier. Which looked like it could break at any second.</p>
<p>He tried to hurry back to his dorm before the bag would break, and ultimately the bottles as well. Not wanting to waste good alcohol, or money for that matter. He waited for the doors of the elevator to open to the third floor before scurrying down the hall towards his dorm. When he arrived he noticed the door was already opened, and a guy with a broad back was leaning on the doorframe.</p>
<p>“Uhm, hello?” The guy turned around to face Beomgyu, who was very confused as to who this man was and why he was standing there. The guy had a sharp jawline, thick eyebrows and average sized facial features. He had a kind of mysterious vibe about him. Before any of them could say anything, Wooyoung dashed out of their dorm. Having heard the confused greeting of the guy with the noisy bottles.</p>
<p>“Hi Beomie, this is my boyfriend, San. I told you about him a while ago” he explained, not wanting to worry his roommate and make him think there had been a break in or something.</p>
<p>“Hello” San spoke with a smoky voice, further adding to the mysteriousness about him. Beomgyu greeted him back, going inside with Wooyoung. He went over to his desk and put all of the bottles on the sturdy surface.</p>
<p>“Are you having people over?” Wooyoung asked, noticing the number of bottles. Which would be way too much for just one person.</p>
<p>“Yeah, if it’s alright with you? I meant to ask earlier but I couldn’t find you.” Beomgyu answered with hopes of not having to cancel his plans to hang out with his friends. He would of course respect Wooyoung’s decision if he didn’t want to have company.</p>
<p>“Of course! I’m going to stay with San for the weekend anyways, so you don’t have to worry about that,” he responded, smiling at his roommate. “And hey, if you’re having someone overnight just remember to use protection” he added, winking at him as he finished.</p>
<p>“It’s not like that”</p>
<p>“Sure”</p>
<p>Wooyoung put something into a bag that was almost full and stood up from his previous crouching position on the floor. He ignored Beomgyu’s negations to the cheeky remark he made, going over to his boyfriend.</p>
<p>“Have fun!” he said as he waved to his roommate, before leaving hand in hand with his boyfriend. Beomgyu chuckled a bit, rolling his eyes as he watched the door close behind them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was cold outside that evening. Something Kai had noticed when he stood outside of the arcade, waiting for his date to show up. He was glad he’d brought a jacket to put on over his hoodie. Otherwise he’d be freezing his ass off by now.</p>
<p>“Kai!” a silvery voice came from his left side. He turned around to face the person he asked out just a few days earlier, Chohee. She was wearing a huge oversized t-shirt with a belt around it, accentuating her curvy figure. He felt a wave of panic wash over him, the anxiety of actually being on a date seemed to finally hit him.</p>
<p>“Hey, shall we go inside?” he asked in an attempt to not make the situation awkward. She nodded and they walked in together. “So what do you want to play? You choose anything you want, my treat” Kai offered generously, starting to feel better and more confident with each passing minute.</p>
<p>“Ooh can we do the racing thing?” Chohee answered enthusiastically and pointed towards the racecar simulations, jumping a bit as she did so. Kai giggled at her cuteness and nodded. She grabbed his hand and scurried off towards the game, dragging him along with her. “Let’s see what you got tall guy”</p>
<p>They sat down in the two different car seats, intending to race each other. Kai had originally planned on letting her win, but it turned out he didn’t need to fake being bad. She was amazing, and to put it simple, she kicked his ass. They played a few rounds, her winning each and every one of them.</p>
<p>“You want to try one of those dance machines?” Kai suggested. Chohee, who had been busy eating a churro she’d just impulsively bought from a kiosk inside the arcade, whipped around and looked at the place Kai was now pointing to. It seemed she hadn’t noticed the dance machines before then, considering how she didn’t want to leave them after playing the first time.</p>
<p>The night went on incredibly well. After a while of exploring the inside of the arcade, trying lots of different machines they started to feel hungry. So they ate dinner at a restaurant opposite the arcade. At this point it was getting late and Kai was beginning to feel tired.</p>
<p>However they went back inside the arcade, or Chohee did and Kai followed her. She headed straight for the claw machine, housing multiple kinds of stuffed animals. She inserted a coin into the slot and steered the claw towards a purple penguin. </p>
<p>She repeated this three times, failing every time. After the last try she gave up, and kicked the bottom of the machine with her boot. She turned to Kai with a disappointed pout on her face.</p>
<p>“I’ve never actually won anything from one of these,” Chohee said, laughing a bit to herself. “I just.. I just really wanted that purple penguin” she added with longing in her voice, glancing over at the unbeaten claw machine.</p>
<p>The pair decided to call it a day and prepared to leave. Chohee went to the ladies room, and Kai used the time to himself to text his roommate. Wanting to make sure the dorm was vacated for the rest of the evening.</p>
<p>Taehyun answered pretty quickly, accepting Kai’s request to get the dorm to himself. It wasn’t like he was expecting something to happen between him and Chohee. But he wanted to hang out with her further.</p>
<p>Ten minutes later, they were on their way back. Walking on the small paths leading back to the campus in the dim streetlights. Kai glanced to his side, noticing how Chohee was practically shivering.</p>
<p>“Are you cold?” he asked.</p>
<p>“No, I’m fi-”</p>
<p>“-You’re shivering,” Kai interrupted her, starting to remove his own jacket. “Take this” he held it out towards her. At first she didn’t want to trouble him, but caved after Kai insisted she’d take it. After she’d put on the jacket, he grasped her left hand in his right one. Saying he’d warm her up, which was just an excuse. Because in reality, he just wanted to hold her hand. And she didn’t mind.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A firm knock interrupted the silence inside Beomgyu’s dorm, which was empty except for him. He had busied himself with rearranging the desks to stand in between the two beds. Creating a seating area for the uno playing later tonight. But the time flew past and it was already six o’clock.</p>
<p>He got up from his bed and walked to the door to open it. On the other side stood Taehyun, shortly followed by Yeonjun and Soobin. They greeted each other and they all went inside, taking off their shoes before leaving the entrance.</p>
<p>“So, what are we doing” Yeonjun spoke with a clear voice.</p>
<p>“Uhm, uno? I think that’s what Beomgyu meant by ‘ Uno and chill’” Taehyun answered, matter of factly.</p>
<p>“Oh right, I totally forgot,” Yeonjun seemed to remember the conversation in their group chat earlier that day. “We were a bit preoccupied before coming here-” Yeonjun stopped mid-sentence. Soobin had hit him and was now shaking his head, signalling for his boyfriend to stop talking.</p>
<p>“Anyways, shall we begin?” Beomgyu had taken a spot on his bed, shuffling the uno cards. The others sat down as well, Yeonjun and Soobin on the opposite side of the table, Taehyun beside him. And after the cards had been dealt they began playing. </p>
<p>A while later they’d played two rounds and were well into their third one. Each of them had gotten their own soju bottle, and it was safe to say that they were all tipsy by now.</p>
<p>“Pick up two cards Soobin” Yeonjun said cheekily, smirking at his boyfriend as he put down a +2 card.</p>
<p>“No thank you, Beomgyu pick up four” Soobin laid another +2 card on top of Yeonjun’s.</p>
<p>Beomgyu however, did not want to pick up any more cards than he already had. So he laid two +2 cards. Adding up to 8 cards with the existing pile, now directed towards Taehyun.</p>
<p>“Ooh” Yeonjun ooed as Beomgyu put his cards down, directing his gaze towards Taehyun. Not expecting what was to come.</p>
<p>“Yeonjun…” Taehyun started with a low, mischievous tone of voice.</p>
<p>“No.. please don’t” </p>
<p>“Pick up 12,” He smirked as he put down a black +4 card. At this point Soobin and Beomgyu were both giggling their asses off, watching the mental breakdown of Yeonjun who had put down the first +2 card. Starting this whole mess.</p>
<p>Yeonjun picked up the bottle of soju he had and took a big gulp of it. Only swallowing half, the rest bellowed out of his mouth. Spilling all over him and his clothes. Beomgyu and Taehyun laughed even harder at this. Soobin grabbed the bottle out of his boyfriend’s hand and put it down on the table before he could spill more.</p>
<p>Soobin took Yeonjun with him to their own dorm, to help him clean up and change out of the wet clothes. Which left Beomgyu and Taehyun alone.</p>
<p>“You wanna play something else? While we wait for them to return I mean” Taehyun suggested.</p>
<p>“How about twenty questions?”</p>
<p>“Sure”</p>
<p>“Alright, I’ll go first,” Beomgyu said. “What’s your favorite color?” He decided to start off with a mild question, not knowing how extreme he should go yet.</p>
<p>“Yellow. What is it like to be with a man, like in bed?” Beomgyu was very taken aback by Taehyun’s question. He definitely was not expecting that.</p>
<p>“It’s uh,” Beomgyu had no idea what he was supposed to answer. He wondered why Taehyun chose to ask this question. “It’s good” Taehyun stared into Beomgyu’s eyes as he waited for a response, and didn’t stop when he had gotten one.</p>
<p>“What’s it like being with a woman?” </p>
<p>“It’s good,” The two boys kept looking into each other’s eyes, the alcohol contributing to the tension filling the room. They continued asking questions, Taehyun’s being pretty unusual. Especially for a straight guy. With each question answered they moved closer and closer, until the two of them were mere centimetres apart.</p>
<p>If  Beomgyu and Taehyun had been alone that night, from the start, things might have ended differently. But unfortunately, Yeonjun and Soobin chose that exact moment to return to their friends. Which snapped the two boys out of their momentary enchantment, quickly moving away from each other.</p>
<p>The night continued like nothing had happened. And soon the couple decided to leave, becoming too tired to play. Taehyun however, who had been “kicked out” of his own dorm by his roommate, would be staying overnight.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I finally finished the third chapter, most of which I wrote at 2 am lol. My sleep schedule is messed up but I hope you enjoy</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Physical</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Let’s spice things up shall we?</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was late, the sun had set hours ago. Leaving Beomgyu with his thoughts, blooming under the pale light of the night sky shining in through the window of his dorm. He was sitting on his bed, his gaze falling on the blonde boy asleep on his roommates bed. He was breathing softly, in and out, distracting Beomgyu from the discord going on in his mind.</p>
<p>Earlier that evening, the two boys had shared a weird moment. One that Beomgyu could not wrap his head around. The blonde guy, Taehyun, who was now sleeping in his dorm, wearing a t-shirt he had loaned him. Was supposedly straight. Which left him even more confused.</p>
<p>What was he playing at earlier if that was the case. Was he just using Beomgyu to try something new? Or had there been a different motive..? Something to explain why he had jumped away from the other as soon as their two friends had walked in. Not wanting to get caught.</p>
<p>However, Beomgyu’s mind was stuck on the thought of something happening between the two. Forming a relationship with the other boy. The mere thought of dating someone again stressed him out. He hated how vulnerable it made him feel. Whilst deep in thought he unconsciously started scratching at the base of his thumb, not stopping until he noticed it had turned a bright shade of red.</p>
<p>Deciding he was not in an ideal state of mind to make any type of decision regarding this, he laid back down in his bed. Intending to sleep, despite continuingly being enticed by the sleeping boy opposite of him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The darkness of the late Sunday evening spread throughout the campus of MOA academy. With it a chilly October breeze blew in through the open window of Hueningkai and Taehyun’s dorm.</p>
<p>The latter of the two was studying for a test he would be having later that week. He was sitting at his desk with books sprawled all over the place. Whereas Kai was lying on his bed watching YouTube on his laptop.</p>
<p>Taehyun had a rather hard time focusing. Even though his roommate Kai had headphones on, Taehyun could hear the distinct mumbles erupting from them. He supposed Kai hadn’t bought those headphones for the quality, rather the cheap price.</p>
<p>But the disturbance was only part of the problem. Taehyun’s mind was somewhere else. Not present in his dorm, taking in the information provided from the textbook laying open in front of him. He was stuck, lingering in the moment from two days earlier.</p>
<p>He was sure the alcohol was the only reason for the way he acted that night. Confident it wouldn’t have mattered whoever was there with him at the time. It had nothing to do with Beomgyu, he tried to convince himself.</p>
<p>But without permission, his mind continued to wander deeper into the thought. What would have happened if Soobin and Yeonjun hadn’t returned so soon? How far would they have gone..?</p>
<p>He tried to stop himself from thinking further of it. Tried imagining himself elsewhere, in the gardens perhaps. Looking at the stars or enjoying the beautiful environment created by the different types of plants. But to no avail. </p>
<p>Instead, he imagined Beomgyu. How close they had been to kissing that night. He recalled the feeling of his breath on his lips, like a ghost of the sensation he would have felt if they hadn’t been interrupted.</p>
<p>He imagined he was close to him even now, touching him without worrying about prying eyes. A warm feeling spread through his stomach at the thought. And it didn’t stop there. A sensation of warmth washed over Taehyun as he sat in his desk chair.</p>
<p>His face turned extremely red as he became suddenly aware of the fact that he was not alone. If Hueningkai turned around from his lying position on his bed, he would see what was going on with his roommate. Embarrassed and afraid of getting caught, Taehyun decided it would be best to leave.</p>
<p>He stood up hastily and sat off towards the exit. As Tae passed his roommate he heard him ask where he was going. To which he mumbled a faint “for a walk” and left. Frantically hoping Kai hadn’t noticed anything.</p>
<p>His mind refused to clear from the thoughts which had caused this situation from the beginning. Which resulted in Taehyun not paying attention as to where he was going. Yet somehow he found himself desperately knocking on the door numbered 311.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Taehyun was striding down the corridors towards his history class, which would begin in five minutes. He was feeling kind of strange. Usually he would make his way to the classroom quickly in order to secure a seat next to his friend, Beomgyu. </p>
<p>Today however, he felt slightly reluctant to arrive at his destination. Mostly because it was a Sunday morning and he’d been robbed of his chance to sleep in this weekend by a morning lecture.</p>
<p>And partly because of, well, Beomgyu.</p>
<p>Nonetheless, he’d have to face him again eventually. And so he entered the history classroom. His gaze immediately fixed upon his friend sitting beside the window, in their usual spot. Taehyun approached Beomgyu, who turned his head at the movement in his peripheral vision.</p>
<p>Their eyes met for a moment, before both of them turned away. Beomgyu looked at their professor at the front of the classroom. Taehyun looked down at his bag, sitting down beside the brown haired boy.</p>
<p>The history teacher, Mr. Bang, began the lecture, talking about the academy after the fire incident. But neither of the two boys seated at the back of the classroom paid any sort of attention to him.</p>
<p>They were completely focused on the small movements of the other person. More than once nudging or accidentally touching each other. Which sent sparks through both of their bodies.</p>
<p>Taehyun could not comprehend what was making him feel this way. Never before had one of his friends affected him like this, just by touching his hand or leg. Something inside him didn’t want the sparks of excitement to cease. What was happening to him..?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Through his half asleep state, Beomgyu could hear a knock on the door to his dorm. The first thought that popped into his head was that Wooyoung had returned from his boyfriend’s place early. But later realised that made no sense, since he would’ve just unlocked the door instead of knocking.</p>
<p>Confused as to who was outside his door at this time, he stood up from his bed. Taking slow and tired steps towards the door, the person outside continuously knocking on the surface of the door.</p>
<p>Beomgyu opened the door and, to his surprise, was met by the eyes of Taehyun, staring into his own. They had a certain deep quality to them, as they had on the day they first met in the cafeteria. But something was different, Taehyun’s face bore a strange expression he could not read.</p>
<p>Nonetheless, he invited his friend in. The standing around by his door only contributed to an awkward atmosphere. Which was sure to arise anyways, considering they were alone again.</p>
<p>Together they sat down inside his dorm, Beomgyu on his bed and Taehyun on the other. The blonde boy seemed to have something on his mind, opening his mouth to speak before changing his mind and closing it again. </p>
<p>Beomgyu could tell something was off. Not only by the fact that Tae seemed to have immense trouble speaking his mind. But also by coming to his dorm this late, which wasn’t something they usually did without planning anything beforehand.</p>
<p>“I,” he started, his face flushed red as he heard his own voice break the silence. “I don’t even know why I’m here..” he trailed off. Turning his head away from Beomgyu. Taehyun finally seemed to realise where he was. As if he’d been sleepwalking, he couldn’t remember clearly going there.</p>
<p>“Is something wrong?” Beomgyu asked soothingly, genuinely concerned and somewhat confused. Tae looked at him, before standing up again. Without a word he started to walk towards the door he’d just come in through.</p>
<p>Beomgyu, who had become wide awake by this point, hastened to catch up with the other. Apparently moving pretty quietly. Because just as Beomgyu reached Taehyun, he turned around again, startled by how close they suddenly were.</p>
<p>Their eyes met for a second time. Beomgyu saw Taehyun’s bottom lip quiver slightly. When he focused his vision back on the blonde boy’s eyes, he noticed they were fixed on his own lips. </p>
<p>Maybe it had been obvious from the start, but realisation finally dawned upon Beomgyu. He understood why Taehyun was acting so weird. Perhaps he had been acting weird too, the past couple of days. Ever since the two of them had almost kissed.</p>
<p>Beomgyu took a step closer, Taehyun did not back away. His eyes searched for something in the others’. All the while coming closer and closer to each other once again. Both of them could feel the other’s breath as their lips were mere centimetres apart.</p>
<p>Taehyun couldn’t take it anymore, he reached forward and connected their lips. At first the kiss was gentle, the two boys savouring the sweetness of the other person. Then it turned into a needy mess. </p>
<p>Beomgyu pulled the other closer to him, putting a hand on his waist. As he did so he felt a bulge against his leg. Taking his free hand, he softly pressed onto it. Taehyun reacted immediately, releasing a surprised whimper into their kiss.</p>
<p>“Have you ever tried fingering yourself?” Beomgyu whispered into Taehyun’s ear after having broken the kiss. The action made him tremble under Beomgyu’s grip. His voice was deep and raspy, threatening to pull Tae into an unbreakable trance.</p>
<p>He nodded, keeping eye contact with the other boy. Fearing if he looked away, Beomgyu would extend fangs and bite him or something. Instead he faced him, even though a smug smirk appeared on his face after he had nodded.</p>
<p>“So, what are you exactly?” Beomgyu asked him. But after noticing Taehyun’s confused expression he explained. “Your sexuality dumbass” he said jokingly.</p>
<p>“I’m straight”</p>
<p>“Really?” Beomgyu paused for a moment, raising his eyebrows at Taehyun. “Then why” he gestured towards them, how close they were and Taehyun’s ‘situation’.</p>
<p>“I.. I just wanted help, I don’t know. I wasn’t really thinking”</p>
<p>“I’ll help you..” Beomgyu dragged Taehyun with him back to the bed. Stopping before it, reaching down to unbuckle his jeans. The nervousness bubbled up inside Taehyun, threatening to bust at any moment. </p>
<p>Pulling down the now unbuckled jeans, revealing a hard cock dripping with precum. Beomgyu pushed Taehyun back slightly, so he’s now sitting down on the bed. While also moving himself, kneeling down in front of the blonde boy.</p>
<p>Taehyun knew what was about to happen. But he could in no way prepare himself for the wave of absolute bliss crashing over him. He groaned, not being able to control himself  with the sudden pleasure.</p>
<p>Beomgyu was working his way around Taehyun’s cock with skill. Sucking, swirling his tongue around the tip in his mouth. Earning soft moans from the other, who bucked his hips closer to Beomgyu.</p>
<p>Taehyun opened his eyes and looked down towards Beomgyu. Meeting his eyes, the brown haired boy continued to suck him off. A new wave of pleasure at the sight washed over him. Soon he’d reach his limit.</p>
<p>Taehyun delved deeply into the feeling, loving every bit of it. The way he made him feel was completely new, it had never been this good. He began to jerk slightly, a knot in his stomach was forming.</p>
<p>“I’m..” he could not finish, his speech came out garbled. But Beomgyu understood, and fastened his pace. Bobbing up and down Taehyun’s shaft. Stroking that which he could not fit in his mouth.</p>
<p>And he released, still inside Beomgyu’s mouth. Starting to feel embarrassed about this whole ordeal. Being in this vulnerable state with the other. </p>
<p>Beomgyu who was still in a dilemma about what to do. He wasn’t sure he wanted a relationship, but he could not deny he didn’t want anything from this. And then it came to him, a solution.</p>
<p>“Let’s keep doing this,” he started, laying down next to Taehyun, who had given way to gravity and had fallen backwards onto the mattress. “No strings attached, just a casual fuck every now and then”</p>
<p>“Like friends with benefits?”</p>
<p>“Yeah,” Their eyes met again. “No feelings involved”</p>
<p>“Promise?”</p>
<p>…</p>
<p>“Promise”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you enjoyed, writing this was harder than I expected but its finally done yay!</p>
<p>Also what did you guys think about the comeback? I loved it, the refreshing concept really suits them 🥺</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. I hate</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Don't be shy 👀</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The faint sound of boots against concrete was all Taehyun could hear as he and Soobin walked in silence. The sun had just set behind the mountains surrounding the city, casting a purple and orange glow on the sky above. The air was chilly and smelled of winter, which was fast approaching. The eleventh month of the year nearing its end.</p>
<p>The two of them had decided to go for a walk in the neighbourhood. Enjoying the beautiful scenery of the city. Taehyun had asked Soobin if he wanted to come with him, wanting to share what was on his mind with someone other than himself. To help relieve himself of the burden of carrying it alone.</p>
<p>“My parents have started again,” Tae let out softly, his warm breath showing in the cold air. Soobin turned to face him, a comforting expression on his face. “They’re pestering me to get a girlfriend.” Without thinking about it, he accentuated the first half of the last word. Soobin eyed him carefully, taking in what he had just said.</p>
<p>“Do you want me to set you up with someone?`” He asked, seeking to help his friend. “I think I know someone you might like,” Taehyun glanced at the tall blue haired boy, considering his proposition briefly. It would no doubt solve his problem and get his parents off his back. But he was not sure how he felt about it.</p>
<p>Sure he’d like to get a girlfriend, but what would he tell his sexual mate? Maybe he was overthinking it. He did not owe Beomgyu an explanation, they were merely friends with benefits. It’s not like they were exclusive. And he would only be set up with Soobin’s friend in order to satisfy his parents.</p>
<p>Taehyun could not help but let his mind wander back to the steamy night three weeks ago. Wondering if he’d ever regret agreeing to it in the first place. Or any of the times since. He and Beomgyu had shared multiple hookups during those three weeks. In multiple different places. They hadn’t gone further than sucking eachother off though. Beomgyu had taught him how to do it, what felt good and how to make it interesting.</p>
<p>Soobin nudged his shoulder, they’d been silent yet again as they walked beside each other. “So?” Taehyun looked at him again, before shaking his head slightly. He did not feel good about it, felt guilty somehow.</p>
<p>“Do you think being friends with benefits is a good thing..?” Soobin looked at him with wariness in his gaze. Studying the question, trying to figure out the best answer.</p>
<p>“No,” he finally broke the silence, speaking calmly. “I don’t think it’s a good idea. Someone always ends up getting hurt in situations like that.” he added, his voice adopting a soothing quality. “Are you okay Taehyun?” he stopped walking, fixing his eyes on his friend.</p>
<p>“Yeah” he shrugged the question off, only for Soobin to put his hands on his shoulders. Preventing him from running away.</p>
<p>“Are you sure?” he nodded slowly. The grip on his shoulders released, Soobin nodding in understanding while retreating slightly. “Well, if you ever want to talk,” The two boys continued on their path, now engulfed in darkness. Setting off on the path that would lead them back to their dorms.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Can anyone explain what the word equilibrium means?” Ms. Song asked her class. She, a young professor specialising in physics, pointed to one of Taehyun’s classmates who was eagerly raising her hand.</p>
<p>“Equilibrium means, in this case, a state in which opposing forces or influences are balanced” the girl answered enthusiastically. The professor nodded, moving to face the whiteboard. She began drawing what looked like a seesaw.</p>
<p>“This is an example of what we’ll be focusing on in today’s lesson,” Ms. Song pointed to the drawing on the board. Which wasn’t very well drawn, but then again, she was a teacher of physics not art.</p>
<p>For some reason, the jeans Taehyun had thrown on that morning, became a little tighter. Especially around the crotch area. Oh fuck. His mind immediately went into a state of frenzy. He hadn’t even been thinking about anything exciting, nor looked at anyone in that way. Nonetheless, he focused his mind on something unarousing. Trying to get rid of his problem before anyone noticed. Which would only result in his embarrassment.</p>
<p>To put it simple, his plan did not work. The unwelcomed addition to his frame stayed in its place, clearly visible to anyone who looked. Taehyun was glad he’d worn an oversized hoodie that day, he could easily hide with the hem of it. </p>
<p>Yet he felt uncomfortable staying where he currently was. So he put his hand up, interrupting the teacher mid speech. She looked annoyed and reluctantly called upon him. </p>
<p>“Do you have a question about the lecture Mr. Kang?”</p>
<p>“Can I go to the bathroom?”</p>
<p>She looked at him for a moment, sighed, and dismissed him with a wave of her hand. He seized his chance and sprung to his feet, shoving his hands into the pocket of his hoodie. He hurried out of the classroom, worrying his professor would change her mind. Taehyun glanced over his shoulder, back towards the classroom he just came from, making sure he was free.</p>
<p>In that short amount of time, he failed to notice the approaching boy walking towards him. But when he faced his front again, it was too late. The two boys bumped into each other, several objects falling to the ground in front of them. Including a calculator and a large notebook.</p>
<p>The chocolate brown haired boy who had been carrying the items, bent to the floor to pick them up again. Taehyun recognised the soft curls of his friend Beomgyu, who couldn’t have had more perfect timing.</p>
<p>“Hey, do you have some time?” Beomgyu straightened up at the sound of Taehyun’s voice, realising who he’d bumped into. He hadn’t been paying attention as to where he was going either.</p>
<p>“I mean, I was on my way to math class,” he said slightly confused. “Why do you ask?”</p>
<p>“How much time before it starts?”</p>
<p>“About 10 minutes”</p>
<p>“Perfect” </p>
<p>Taehyun grabbed Beomgyu’s sleeve and dragged him with him towards a close by janitor's cupboard. Opening the door and locking it behind them. He continued further into the room, bringing Beomgyu with him to a counter.</p>
<p>“What are you doing?” Beomgyu asked. Taehyun motioned for him to sit on the counter, which he did. Gently hopping onto it, expecting something other than the intentions the blonde boy had in mind.</p>
<p>“Can I suck your dick?” Beomgyu raised his eyebrows at the request. A flutter formed inside of him and travelled down to his lower stomach. He definitely hadn’t been expecting this.</p>
<p>“Sure” Beomgyu reached down to untie the string of his sweatpants, pulling out his now hardening cock. He was getting more and more excited with every second passing. Anticipation building inside of him.</p>
<p>Taehyun grasped him with warm soft fingers, stroking him painfully slow. He put one hand on Beomgyu’s inner thigh, squeezing it slightly. And then he moved closer with his face, putting his lips to the tip of Beomgyu’s cock. He began licking around the tip, moving his hand on his base in an up and down motion.</p>
<p>Beomgyu let out tiny moans, barely audible further than a meter away. He was absorbed in the feeling of Taehyun’s mouth, now engulfing him completely. Beomgyu threw his head back, groaning louder. He put a hand behind him on the counter he was sitting on, steadying himself. The other found its way to Taehyun’s soft hair, resting on top while intertwining his fingers between strands of hair.</p>
<p>Taehyun went crazy over the sounds Beomgyu was making. The sounds he was making because of him. And the light pressure of his hand in his hair, pulling it softly. The warmth and tingling feeling washed over him, threatening to drown him. It was all driving him to the edge. Taehyun reached down a hand to his jeans, unzipping the fly. He started stroking himself while sucking and swirling his tongue around Beomgyu’s dick.</p>
<p>Both of them started moving irregularly, Taehyung fastening his pace and Beomgyu bucking his hips forward every now and then. And without warning, they released almost in unison. Taehyun in his hand, and Beomgyu still in his mouth. He tasted the thick warm liquid, which had a salty quality to it. He swallowed, not wanting to keep it in his mouth.</p>
<p>“Damn, you’ve gotten better at that,” Beomgyu said chuckling, out of breath. Tae stood up and looked at him. “Have you been practicing?” he added smirking as he said it.</p>
<p>“How would I have been practicing without you?” Beomgyu reached a hand to Taehyun’s lip, wiping away some of the white liquid which had spilled from his mouth. Their eyes met for a second, the lack of light in the room making their pupils dilate.</p>
<p>“I should probably get going now or I’ll be late” Beomgyu spoke, breaking their eye contact and glancing at his notebook and calculator laying beside him. The two of them began cleaning up a bit in the room, reluctant to leave behind a mess that would tell the tale of them being there.</p>
<p>They left the room one by one, being careful of not being seen leaving together. Beomgyu went first, scurrying off to his math class. Taehyun waited a few seconds before leaving the room as well. And then he hurried back to his own class.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The usual crowd of hungry students filled the tables in the west cafeteria. The huge windows letting the sun of high noon brighten up the place. The line to get food was extra long today, since the school kitchen had decided to serve their famous soft tofu stew. Everyone who attended the academy seemed to love it, and Yeonjun, Soobin and Taehyun were not an exemption. </p>
<p>The three of them were seated at a round table near the vending machines in the corner of the room. Their two other friends wouldn’t be joining them since they had math class during the time. It was only one day of the week however, otherwise the group would be able to eat lunch together.</p>
<p>“I’m so glad Huening is finally in a good relationship,” Soobin voiced, putting his spoon beside his bowl. “It’s been awful watching him get hurt over and over again. But I think Chohee will be good for him”</p>
<p>“Agreed, I just wonder when he’ll introduce us to her. It’s not like we’re his best friends or anything” Yeonjun added, rolling his eyes. “I bet he’s gonna marry her in secret or something” Taehyun and Soobin looked at him with raised eyebrows. “Oh come on, when have my calculations ever been wrong?”</p>
<p>“Well...”</p>
<p>“Shut up, that was one time.” Tae and Soobin giggled a little, reminiscing over the fabulous incident that happened a year ago. Yeonjun did not like being reminded of it, and therefore sought to change the subject.</p>
<p>“Maybe you should date someone as well Taehyun,” he started, with a strange expression on his face. “But you probably won’t have time for it though, considering how much time you spend with Beomgyu nowadays.”</p>
<p>Taehyun inhaled in one swift motion, bringing air as well as water into his trachea. He almost dropped the glass he’d been drinking from. “What?” his voice came out croaky, coughing uncontrollably as he tried to recover. A warm feeling spilled over his face, resting in his cheeks.</p>
<p>“Are you okay?” Soobin asked, concerned for his friend’s wellbeing. Taehyun nodded, regaining himself. Yeonjun looked surprised at his reaction, not knowing what to say next.</p>
<p>“Actually,” Tae began speaking slowly, racking his brain for any explanation or excuse to get him out of this situation. Fearing the two of them would think him and Beomgyu were doing stuff together. “I feel pretty weird hanging out with Beomgyu. I don’t want him to think I’m into him or something. I mean, I’m straight.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Here is another chapter my dudes and the plot thickens ;D</p>
<p>I hope you like it :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. To admit</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Trouble in paradise?</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Can I get three iced americanos and two lattes, please?” Beomgyu extended his left arm and gave his card to the cashier of the coffee shop. It was a man who looked to be even younger than himself, he had dark skin and freckles all over his face. He accepted his card back from him, as well as a beeper to notify him when his order was finished.</p>
<p>“Hey Kai, why isn’t Chohee here?” Beomgyu retreated to the table in the corner of the room, where his friends were seated. They had chosen to hang out at the coffee shop that evening, wanting to enjoy the beautiful atmosphere it created after sundown. The red and pink fairy lights were strewn across the ceiling, casting their light onto the furniture and people below.</p>
<p>“She’s visiting her parents in Daegu”</p>
<p>“Oh, is she also from Daegu?” Beomgyu, who had just sat down next to Soobin, was reminded of his and Hueningkai’s days as youngsters. Growing up in Daegu together. Maybe they had met her before.</p>
<p>“Yeah, but not the same area as us” The group of five spent the rest of the evening talking about their lives. They drank their coffees and enjoyed the presence of each other, before leaving the coffee shop.</p>
<p>By the time they left, it had grown quite dark outside. The only source of light stemming from the still lit fairy lights of the coffee shop. Their shadows grew smaller and fainter as they walked further away from the light source.</p>
<p>“Da, da, da, da...” Soobin, who had been quiet for most of the evening, was now mumbling under his breath. Beomgyu had seen him staring at his cup of coffee earlier with such intensity, he’d been wondering if his friend was alright. “Da, da, da, da...”</p>
<p>“What’s that?” Soobin looked up at the sound of Taehyun’s voice. He too seemed to have heard Soobin’s mumbling.</p>
<p>“I’ve had this song stuck in my head all day. But I have no idea what it is.” He blurted out, sounding quite annoyed. Which was understandable. Beomgyu however, who recognized the lyrics, had no intention of enlightening his friend.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>50 Shades of Gay<br/>Tuesday, Nov 17</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Teahyun<br/>“Do you guys want to join me and my family for dinner on Saturday?”<br/>“They apparently want to meet you”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>BAMgyu changed the group name to Da🐬 Da🐬 Da🐬 Da🐬</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobinnie<br/>“Really Beomgyu?”</p>
<p>BAMgyu<br/>“;)”</p>
<p>Teahyun<br/>“Guys”</p>
<p>BAMgyu<br/>“Sure, dinner’s fine”</p>
<p>Yeonnie~<br/>“Yeah that sounds good”</p>
<p>Ning Ning<br/>“I’ll be there”</p>
<p>Soobinnie<br/>“Yeah, sure”</p>
<p>Teahyun<br/>“Cool”</p>
<p>Ning Ning<br/>“Hey guys..”<br/>“Is inhaling soap bad?”</p>
<p>BAMgyu<br/>“I-“</p>
<p>Teahyun<br/>“Kai wtf”</p>
<p>Soobinnie <br/>“You inhaled soap?”</p>
<p>Ning Ning<br/>“I didn’t do it on purpose :/“</p>
<p>Yeonnie~<br/>“smh”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was early on a Wednesday morning. Birds could be heard outside, singing as the sun rose before them. They’d be leaving any day now, for a warmer climate during the cold winter.</p>
<p>Beomgyu was busy packing his bag for the day. Putting books and various objects he’d be needing, in his bag. He was trying to be as quiet as he could muster, in order to not wake his sleeping roommate. Wooyoung did not have an early class, as Beomgyu did.</p>
<p>Just as he finished packing, he heard a knock on the door. Checking to see if Wooyoung was still asleep, which he was, Beomgyu swung his bag over his shoulder and made his way to the door and opened it.</p>
<p>Soobin stood there, clothed in a big coat and scarf. He was probably also going to an early class that day.</p>
<p>“Hi, I just wanted to ask you something,” The blue-haired boy spoke a bit too loudly, risking waking the sleeping boy inside the dorm. Beomgyu went outside with Soobin, closing the door behind him, which locked automatically. “Do you like Taehyun?”</p>
<p>The air suddenly felt very thick around Beomgyu, as if it didn’t fit in his trachea anymore. Did Soobin know?</p>
<p>“No, I don’t,” Beomgyu could not understand why he was asking this. For all he knew, Beomgyu and Taehyun were simply friends, nothing more. “Why are you asking?”</p>
<p>“Oh, it was just something Tae said yesterday” Soobin backed away from him slightly, putting his hands up as if he’d angered Beomgyu. But he was not far off. He did intrigue him. What had Taehyun told him? Did he tell Soobin about the two of them and what they were doing every other day?</p>
<p>“What did he say?” Deciding to play it safe, if Taehyun, in fact, had not told him anything. Beomgyu opted for acting clueless for now.</p>
<p>“He said something about feeling weird hanging out with you because you might think he’d want to date or something” Soobin answered carefully, not sure if he should be telling Beomgyu this. But Taehyun had not confided in Soobin alone, but in a public place and in front of Yeonjun. So how secret could it have been?</p>
<p>“Oh, alright,” Beomgyu could feel his insides boiling. Taehyun had actually said that? He didn’t want to show the fact that he’d become upset after Soobin had told him. Which would definitely lead to suspicion on the matter. “Well, if that was all you wanted to ask. I have to go.”</p>
<p>Beomgyu turned around in the corridor outside his dorm and sat off towards the elevators. His mind was set only on one thing, finding Taehyun. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Sipping on his coffee, Taehyun strode down the corridors of the academy. Walking to his morning English class. He was feeling rather confident this particular Wednesday. But he would not be able to tell you the reason as to why that was. For he himself did not know. </p>
<p>Perhaps it was because he had woken up earlier than usual and gone for a jog. Or perhaps it was because of the caffeine boost he was consuming at this moment. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that he did not have to go to his usual Saturday night family dinner alone. He’d have his friends by his side, which would hopefully spare him from his parents’ pestering. </p>
<p>Or perhaps it was because things between him and his friend Beomgyu were great at the moment. He could not admit to himself that he was enjoying it even half as much as he did. But he could not ignore the facts. How Beomgyu made him feel. </p>
<p>Speaking of the devil, Beomgyu was approaching rapidly from the end of the corridor. Taehyun took another sip from his coffee and thought, maybe a quickie before class?</p>
<p>As Beomgyu got closer however, Tae noticed the foul expression on his face. He had a sudden feeling of guilt, as if he’d done something wrong. The confidence which had earlier been overflowing, was now barely there. </p>
<p>“You feel weird hanging out with me?” His voice was loud, anger lacing into every word.</p>
<p>“I-,” Beomgyu stopped abruptly right in front of him, staring into his eyes. But Taehyun could not recognise those sweet and kind eyes that usually gazed upon him. Now they were narrow and harsh. It was scary. “Who told you that..?”</p>
<p>“That doesn’t matter. Is it true?”</p>
<p>“I didn’t-“</p>
<p>“Want me to find out?” Beomgyu interrupted him, completing his sentence. Although not what he had been meaning to say. “You didn’t seem to think it was weird when we hooked up”</p>
<p>Taehyun was at a complete loss of words. He could not get words of explanation out. His face was hot with shame, this was not what he’d wanted. He didn’t mean what he had told Soobin and Yeonjun. He just didn’t want them to know the truth.</p>
<p>Beomgyu had no intention of waiting for him to explain. He began walking away from him. Bumping into his shoulder as he went past. And the hot liquid, previously in the cup Taehyun was holding, fell to the floor with a splash.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The wind blew in his face, but Taehyun did not care. In fact, he hardly noticed. The only trace of it he could feel was the stinging in his eyes. </p>
<p>He was sitting on an old swing in a small playground, near the academy. This was the agreed upon meeting place, where him and his friends would meet before going to his parents house. </p>
<p>Soobin and Yeonjun arrived after a few minutes, who also took a seat on a pair of swings. If they were talking, Tae did not know. For he was, once again, dwelling on an incident that had already passed. One he desperately wished he could change.</p>
<p>“Taehyun!” A shout brought him out of his daze. It was Hueningkai, he must’ve just gotten there, he thought. “Are you deaf? These guys have been trying to talk to you for minutes!” He pointed towards Yeonjun and Soobin, who were sitting beside him.</p>
<p>“Why do you look so depressed? You’ve been like this for the last couple of days.”</p>
<p>“I’m fine, I’m just stressed out over the upcoming exams that’s all,” Taehyun stood up from his swing. “Let’s go, we’ll be late for dinner if we don’t leave soon” The others shared confused looks.</p>
<p>“Isn’t Beomgyu coming as well?”</p>
<p>“I doubt it..”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I might not be able to write as much this week since I have several exams, but I will definitely try to write as much as I can.</p>
<p>Also I hope you liked this chapter :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Dolphin</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I don't know why but I LOVE writing conflicts. I like the tea lol</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The empty glass bottle fell to the carpet floor in between the two beds. Beomgyu swallowed the last contents of the bottle, which was now among it’s kind. He let out a loud sigh and let his body sink to the mattress. His hair was a mess, his cheeks were flushed pink and the skin around his lips were smeared with alcohol. The arm which had previously been holding the bottle was now draped over the edge of the bed. The other, laying on his stomach.</p>
<p>It was happening again. The same thing he fled from. It had followed him back. Lifting his bare left arm from his stomach, he held it up in front of him. Stroking the pale and darker streaks of skin present. This was the first time in a while he had had the courage to remove his long sleeved shirts, and face himself. Face what he truly looked like underneath the comforting layer of clothing.</p>
<p>Suddenly the door opened behind him, and a rosy cheeked Wooyoung stepped inside. “Hello! W.. welcome back Wooyo- *hiccup*” Beomgyu sat back up on his bed, and waved slightly to his roommate. His speech was slurred and the waving of his hand turned into a wild flail. Wooyung came into the main room after having removed his coat and scarf.</p>
<p>The first thing he noticed were the seven empty soju bottles strewn about the floor. He immediately started worrying. Beomgyu wasn’t supposed to be here tonight, he was supposed to be having dinner with his friends. Why is he here, drinking alone? Wooyoung sat down beside him.</p>
<p>“You know, I” Beomgyu interrupted his own line of speech, giggling. “I am a bad person” If Wooyoung had been worried before, he was scared now. He knew Beomgyu didn’t open up easily, for reasons unknown to him. “I want to run away again, but I can’t escape...” The last part came out as a whimper.</p>
<p>Wooyoung reached out and grasped Beomgyu’s left hand, stroking his knuckles softly. He noticed something on Beomgyu’s forearm, like a tiny stroke of a nude lip liner. He turned Beomgyu’s arm over and to his dismay, saw multiple of the same types of lines covering his arm. They were scars. Among them, a red line stood out. It was smeared and streaked red downwards towards his hand.</p>
<p>“What happened?” At this point Wooyoung was terrified. He’d never seen his friend like this, looking so fragile. Beomgyu raised his drooping head and tried fixing his glossy eyes on his roommate. He smiled sickly, his gaze falling to the floor. “Who hurt you?” Wooyoung’s voice was laced with concern and he spoke quietly.</p>
<p>“Me”</p>
<p>“I caused all of this” A few drops stained the pants Beomgyu was wearing.</p>
<p>“It’s all my fault.” His voice broke, more tears spilling from his eyes.</p>
<p>“I deserve it...” Wooyoung threw his arms around his broken friend, holding him together tightly. He did not dare to let go, for he feared the pieces would scatter beyond repair. His hand moved up and down Beomgyu’s back, stroking the bare skin gently. His body soon went limp, weighing down heavily on Wooyoung’s shoulder. He laid him down on his bed and covered him with a blanket.</p>
<p>“Please...get well soon..”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>_________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Taehyun walked up the narrow steps to the place where he grew up. The house was old and small. Yet he loved it. He loved the simple manner it had, and it would always be his home. He rang the doorbell and not soon after did he hear hurrying footsteps inside the house. The door swung open to reveal a short middle aged woman. Taehyun’s mother.</p>
<p>“Sweetie!” She threw her arms around Taehyun and hugged him tightly. Nearly choking him in the process. She retreated a bit from the hug and kissed both sides of Taehyun’s cheeks.</p>
<p>“Mom..” Taehyun wished dearly that death would embrace him instead of his mother. He wiggled out of her grip, deeming to have been in it for a long enough amount of time as to not offend her while doing so. She stepped aside to let Taehyun and his three friends in through the door.</p>
<p>She smiled at the other three boys when they passed her in the small entrance. Closing the door behind them, shutting out the cold November air from following them inside the house.</p>
<p>“You’re right on time,” Mrs. Kang said, leaving the hallway and the group of boys who’d just arrived. She went into a room connected to it by an old sliding door, which was wide open. Through it, there came a lovely scent of food. “We just put out everything on the table”</p>
<p>When they had removed their shoes and coats they followed her into the dining room, where several plates were set out on a large table. Ten people could easily fit around it, so their gathering of six would be no problem. In the middle of the table sat a large pot with ramen and beside it a couple of side dishes.</p>
<p>“It’s not much-“</p>
<p>“Ramen!” Yeonjun, who had entered the dining room last, exclaimed with joy at the sight of the food. He quickly realised that Mrs. Kang had been speaking and apologised hastily. She laughed at his actions, finding him very cute.</p>
<p>“Why don’t we all take a seat,” Mrs. Kang gestured towards the low table and the cushion chairs surrounding it. Everyone sat down, Taehyun and his friends on one side of the table and Taehyun’s mother on the other. “Yah! Get over here!” She suddenly turned around and shouted into the kitchen.</p>
<p>Out came a man with dark hair and a small beard. He was only slightly taller than Mrs. Kang was and he walked with a kind of swagger. “Sorry love, I was just cleaning up a bit,” He hurried to the table and sat down beside his wife. “So, I assume you’re Taehyun’s friends. But wasn’t there supposed to be four of you?”</p>
<p>“Yeah, but he couldn’t make it” Taehyun butted in before anyone else could answer his father. Soobin eyed him curiously from his seat at the end of the table. The other two were smiling and nodding awkwardly. None of them knew the reason as to why Beomgyu hadn’t shown up. But considering Taehyun’s response, they assumed Beomgyu had told him he’d be busy.</p>
<p>“Well that’s a pity, but please dig in before the food gets cold” Mrs. Kang reached for a pair of tongs and held them towards the guests. Yeonjun grasped it before anyone else had the chance to, not that it mattered, he just seemed to be very excited about the ramen. They all grabbed a portion of food in turns, taking both noodles and side dishes, Taehyun’s parents let their guests serve themselves first. </p>
<p>“So, tell us a bit about yourselves,” Mr. Kang began, after having swallowed a bite of his food. “Do any of you perhaps have a lady in your life?” The question wasn’t directed towards a single person, rather the three boys who were unknown to him.</p>
<p>“I do,” Kai voiced after a few seconds, realising that neither of the others would say they had a girlfriend, for obvious reasons. He gained the attention of Taehyun’s parents, they looked at him expectantly. “Her name is Chohee and we’ve been together for almost two months now” They smiled and congratulated him.</p>
<p>“What about you two?” They both turned towards Yeonjun and Soobin, who were holding hands underneath the table. Yeonjun opened his mouth to tell them that they were both gay and in a relationship with each other.</p>
<p>“-Soobin’s got a girlfriend, and Yeonjun is single” Taehyun interrupted him. Both Yeonjun and Soobin shot confused looks towards him. He slowly shook his head, begging them with his eyes to go along with it.</p>
<p>“Would you tell us about her?” Mrs. Kang spoke eagerly, who seemed to be very interested in the personal businesses of other people. This however took Soobin by surprise when she started staring at him, silently encouraging him to talk. What was he supposed to do now? </p>
<p>“Well… her name is,” he racked his brain for any name he could come up with. Any name would do, yet he found nothing came to his mind. “Yu Rita, her name is Yu Rita. I met her in class last year” he did not dare continue due to the dead stare Yeonjun was giving him from his left side.</p>
<p>“How wonderful that you’ve found someone at such a young age,” Mr. Kang began with a gleeful expression. “When I was your age I was very irresponsible, and even if I’d met this beautiful lady right here,” Taehyun’s mother hit him lightly on the shoulder, shaking her head while giggling. “I don’t think she would’ve been my wife today”</p>
<p>Taehyun visibly cringed, but no one was paying attention to him. They were all listening to Taehyun’s parents. Now sharing the story of how they met. Which Taehyun, of course, had already heard many times. They sat and told stories for a while, finishing their food. And soon the hour grew late and it was time to leave.</p>
<p>After having said goodbye, they left the house. They walked together in silence for about thirty seconds. Yeonjun and Soobin didn't want to wait to hear an explanation from Taehyun, and so decided that this was a perfect moment for it.</p>
<p>“Why the hell did you lie to them Taehyun?” Taehyun halted, keeping his eyes fixed on the ground beneath him. The others stopped walking too, waiting. He struggled a little with getting the words out, he didn’t know how to explain himself to them.</p>
<p>“I just… I was afraid,” He started, speaking very quietly. “I didn’t want to give them an excuse to be rude or homophobic…” The other boys, who were standing in front of him, were silent. “They’re very conservative, they’ve always been like that..”</p>
<p>“It’s alright Taehyun,” Soobin stepped forward and put a hand on his shoulder. “By the way, who the hell is Yu Rita?” Yeonjun spoke, his tone was that of an angry old man who had just found out that his cat had eaten catnip at someone else’s house.</p>
<p>“Yeonjun, I’m literally gay.” Taehyun and Hueningkai stood and watched the feud with interest. “She’s in my literature class, it was the only name I could come up with,” Soobin tried reasoning with his boyfriend, who did not seem happy about the fact that Soobin knew this girl. “Speaking of Yu Rita, she was the girl I was talking about last week” He was now looking at Taehyun, clearly remembering something he did not.</p>
<p>“When I asked if you wanted to be set up,” Soobin explained further at the sight of Taehyun’s puzzled expression. Right, that. Why did he say no to that? He could see no reason as to why he did so. So what would stop him now?</p>
<p>“About that, I changed my mind.” Taehyun’s eyes met Soobin’s. He looked at him with a questioning expression. As if he was surprised at his change of mind. Or perhaps he just found it strange that he wanted to be set up, considering how reluctant he was the first time he had asked.”I want to be set up”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Chatter came from all around them as they sat in the cafeteria during their joint lunch period. Hueningkai and Soobin were messing around with Yeonjun. Taehyun and Beomgyu were sitting in silence, not saying a word and barely acknowledging each other. Both of them were trying to act as normal as possible in front of the others. But they couldn’t deny that they’d rather be anywhere else, than to be in each other’s presence. </p>
<p>Taehyun had been trying to speak with Beomgyu alone ever since the beginning of the week. Being December and all, perhaps he’d fallen into a hole of holiday spirit and felt the need to get on good terms again. Yet somehow, Beomgyu always seemed to be leaving when he would arrive at group gatherings, which were the only times he’d actually seen him the past week. </p>
<p>“I’m gonna go get a drink.” Beomgyu suddenly stood up and started walking towards the vending machines in the cafeteria. The other’s glanced at him and murmured an ‘okay’ in unison. Taehyun seized his chance, standing up from his seat and following him. His mind was set on explaining why.</p>
<p>“You here to apologise?” Beomgyu spoke, as he inserted money into the slot of the vending machine, pressing a button for a soda. </p>
<p>“Look, I didn’t mean what I said okay?”</p>
<p>“Then why did you say it?” His voice seemed harsher than he remembered it being. It no longer seeped in through his ears like honey, rather it cut through the air like a sharp blade.</p>
<p>“I just didn’t want them to know that we were, you know…”</p>
<p>“What, hooking up?” He turned around sharply and came very close to Taehyun’s face. Too close. “Having sex?”</p>
<p>“Not so loud…” Taehyun looked at the students who were seated closest to the vending machines. None of them seemed to pay any sort of attention to the two of them.</p>
<p>“Why, are you afraid people will hear me?”</p>
<p>“Please..” Taehyun searched for those sweet eyes he wished he could be met by once again. But found only an empty gaze, one reserved only for himself.</p>
<p>“When will you stop lying to yourself Taehyun?” Once again he found himself speechless at the effect Beomgyu had on him. Beomgyu turned around again and bent down to grab the soda he had bought only seconds earlier. He then continued back towards the table where their friends were sitting, like nothing had happened.</p>
<p>_________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>An electrical whirring could be heard from the bathroom of Soobin and Yeonjun’s dorm room. Soobin was laying on their bed, scrolling through his phone, pondering on a question which had been on his mind for a while. Yeonjun was finishing up brushing his teeth in the bathroom, getting ready to go to bed after a long day of classes. As he stepped out of the bathroom he noticed Soobin watching his screen intently, but still not really focusing on it. As if his eyes were stuck on something far away and distant, yet still there. He supposed something was on his mind.</p>
<p>“Hey,” Soobin looked up from his phone, still that same expression on his face. His mouth was slightly open, which Yeonjun thought was adorable. He bent down and kissed him, putting a hand under his chin. “You okay?”</p>
<p>“Have you noticed anything strange with Taehyun?” His expression finally dissolved, and instead formed a question of the thought he’d been struggling to find answers for.</p>
<p>“No, why?” </p>
<p>“He just seems different this term…” Yeonjun thought back on the previous events of the year. The only thing he could think of being different was Beomgyu joining their friend group. But that didn’t have anything to do with Taehyun, so he was lost. Soobin however, firmly believed that his statement was true. ‘He is different somehow.. And it has something to do with Beomgyu...’ He kept these thoughts to himself, for they did not belong entirely to him.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Another slightly overdue chapter, but I hope it's alright. I've been taking a small break to get everyting done at school, there've been a lot of exams the last couple of weeks and I've been pretty stressed. Which hasn't been very good for my mental health. But I'm back now and I hope this chapter will suffice and that you'll enjoy it :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. 134340</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sad boi hours</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>19:01, 11/12-2020</p>
<p>The bittersweet liquid seeped down Beomgyu’s throat. It flowed down like water, easy and welcomed by his body. He started to feel calm after having taken a few sips of the alcohol while waiting for his friends to arrive. It was a cold evening, small spots of ice had formed on the pavement all around the city. But the cold had never bothered him, the chilly air comforted him somehow. Reminded him of times before everything became so messy. Before, him.</p>
<p>“Hey Beomgyu,” Yeonjun and Soobin approached him, waving with big mittens on. They’d agreed to meet up at a local bar close to campus. Beomgyu had gotten there early, as usual, and so he’d ordered a bottle of soju which was now empty. His friends sat down at the round table he was sitting at and a waiter came over to them.</p>
<p>“Three bottles of soju please,” Yeonjun ordered one for each of them, seeming to have ignored the fact that Beomgyu had already had one. Supposedly it didn’t bother him. “So how are you?”</p>
<p>“I’m fine, a bit relieved now that all of the exams for this semester are over. '' The last couple of weeks had been pretty stressful, not only for Beomgyu. All of them had had their schedules packed with exams and tests. As a result, the group had been able to hang out less. “What about you guys?”</p>
<p>“I’m good, but this giant baby has been fussing over getting his results back ever since the last exam ended” Yeonjun pointed towards Soobin who was sitting beside him, biting his lip. The waiter came back with three bottles in hand, wishing them a good evening and walking off again.</p>
<p>“But what if I fail! We’re graduating soon and if I don’t pass I’ll be a failure. No one wants to hire a failure. I’ll have to become a hobo, living off the streets…” Soobin spoke very fast, rambling on and on about what ifs and finally dropped his head on the table. Yeonjun patted him on the back, looking at Beomgyu with a slightly confused expression.</p>
<p>“It’ll be alright Soobin. You’re the smartest one here, you’ll pass with flying colours.” Beomgyu tried comforting his friend as well. He actually believed he spoke the truth, and didn’t doubt for a second that Soobin would do great.</p>
<p>“At least ‘someone’ doesn’t seem to be worrying that much over their exams” Yeonjun spoke again, his voice was laced with an ironic tone.</p>
<p>“I’m jealous.” Soobin said while sitting back up again, a frown on his face.</p>
<p>“Who’re you talking about?” </p>
<p>“Kai, he’s out with Chohee. And he seemed very happy earlier,” Yeonjun continued, taking a sip from his bottle of soju. “And he’s not the only one, Tae is actually also out with a girl.”</p>
<p>Beomgyu’s grip around his bottle tightened ever so slightly. His fingers seemed to twitch a little while he held it to his mouth, gulping down a lot of the liquid inside. He stopped listening to what his friends were talking about, if they even spoke, he didn’t know.</p>
<p>He imagined Taehyun being with this girl, visualising a picture in his mind. He saw them holding hands, her slender hands fit into Tae’s warm ones like a puzzle piece. And so did their lips, they connected smoothly. He saw Taehyun, his hands tracing over her body in the same places he’d once touched Beomgyu.</p>
<p>His insides were bubbling with that familiar feeling, yet it was different this time. His whole chest ached, as if someone was putting pressure on it without pause. It caused his throat to close up, forming a sort of blockade at the bottom of it. It hurt. Why did he suddenly feel like this? </p>
<p>He kept drinking, swallowing the bitter liquid like it would be his salvation. If he was aware of his two friends watching him with concern, he chose to ignore it. For he said nothing, and hardly spoke for the rest of the evening.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>19:01, 11/12-2020</p>
<p>Taehyun swiftly turned around the corner to the building where the Pinchos restaurant lay. He was glad he’d skipped stopping by his dorm before setting out earlier. Because somehow, he’d made it in time, which he was very thankful for of course. He got closer to the restaurant and began searching with his eyes for Rita. Soobin had shown him a video of her from class, but it had been difficult making out what she looked like. The only thing he’d had to go off from was that her hair was short and dyed dirty blonde.</p>
<p>Near the entrance stood a short and lean figure wearing a suit, with short blonde hair cut just above the ears. Taehyun neared the figure, who became clearer and clearer the closer he got. It was a woman. Her ears and nose were pierced and her hair was styled nicely, framing her face perfectly. “Are you Yu Rita?” She turned around when hearing Taehyun’s voice, or perhaps when hearing her name being called.</p>
<p>“Ah yes, you must be Taehyun” She smiled at him, yet somehow the action seemed halfhearted. Tae smiled back at her and asked if they should go inside, considering the cold weather. When they got inside they were immediately met by a host, who guided them to a table inside the restaurant. The lighting was cozy and fit the red retro theme well.</p>
<p>The two of them were seated next to a couple who were sitting very close to each other. A man and a woman, probably also on a date. A waiter had given two menus to them and left after taking their orders. Both Tae and Rita decided to order steak and a glass of wine each. Neither of them seemed to be interested in the other dishes that were served there.</p>
<p>Silence fell over them, laying like a thick fog. There was no denying the fact that it had quickly become awkward. Neither of them looked at each other, Tae was preoccupied with studying the texture of the cloth laying on the table. Rita spared several glances towards the couple sitting next to them. This seemed to go on for a long while, until their food was served.</p>
<p>“So, uhm…” Both of them had started eating after having received their food, yet Taehyun found the awkward silence unbearable. “Do you have any hobbies?” He racked his brain for a conversation starter, finding it very difficult not sounding like a dork. Small talk had never been one of his strengths.</p>
<p>“Huh.. what?” Rita had once again been staring at the couple next to them, now enjoying a fierce make out session. Taehyun followed her gaze, finding himself looking at the couple with longing. Not that he wished to be the recipient of their kisses, rather he felt extremely lonely. Which probably wasn’t a good sign on a first date.</p>
<p>A first date. Was that what this was? Would there be more dates after this one? Why did he suddenly feel guilty? It’s not like he was doing anything wrong. Yet he couldn’t get those words out of his mind. ‘Why do you keep lying to yourself Taehyun?’ Was he lying to himself?</p>
<p>Beomgyu, oh how he wished he could just make everything go back to the way it had been. When they were close, and not avoiding each other. When they enjoyed the thrill of hiding from their friends. Or at least he did. What was he doing? He shouldn’t be here.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Taehyun strode down the dark alleyway, tightening the coat around his body. His date earlier that evening hadn’t exactly gone well. Both him and Yu Rita seemed to be preoccupied with other people. Taehyun’s mind was focused on his friend. How long was he going to be tormented by this one guy. Never left alone, yet always lonely.</p>
<p>A sound a bit further away from the road he was walking on startled Taehyun. It was very dark outside and he was walking along a dimly lit street. He walked towards the source of the sound and discovered that it had been a cat. A cat black as night, it walked on top of the fence trailing the road. The eyes seemed like endless abysses, attracting lost souls like a black hole.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I just wanna say a quick thank you to everyone who’s actually reading this. You make my days better and I’m so thankful for all of you 🥺</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. 00:00</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Well, 😐</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The elevator doors closed behind him with a chime as Taehyun walked down the corridor of the third floor. For the first time in a long while, he was sure of what he was supposed to do. There had to be a reason as to why his friend was constantly occupying his thoughts. Taehyun couldn’t seem to figure it out on his own. After many failed attempts, concluding that he needed the source of it all to solve this mystery of his. The source to his troubles, Beomgyu.</p>
<p>Rapid thumps against wood could be heard in the silent friday evening, as Taehyun knocked on the door of dorm 311. Not long after did the door swing open in front of him, revealing a slightly disheveled Beomgyu. His hair was unkempt and his clothes seemed fit to sleep in. A glint of hope flashed in his eyes, but were quickly replaced by that same cold, empty stare Tae had gotten used to receiving. Beomgyu moved to close the door again, but Taehyun stopped him. He hadn’t gone all the way there just to get the door shut in his face.</p>
<p>“What do you want?”</p>
<p>“Can we talk?” Taehyun pushed forward a little to open the door further again. Beomgyu, who was leaning on it from the inside, took a step back. “Please?” Beomgyu sighed and nodded, finally swinging the door open all the way, inviting him inside his dorm. Then closing it as soon as Tae had stepped inside. </p>
<p>“I’m sorry,” Taehyun began, his voice mellow. His head was bent down, not daring to look Beomgyu directly in the eyes. For he feared he wouldn’t be able to say what he’d planned out in his head before coming here. “I shouldn’t have said what I said, I just panicked. I didn’t know what else to say...” He took a few steps back, feeling the wall against his back. He felt the other boy’s presence looming over him, getting closer. </p>
<p>“How about the truth?” Beomgyu put a hand under Taehyun’s chin, forcing him to look him in the eyes. Those big fairy-like eyes stared back at him, as innocent as they’d done the day they met. Beomgyu melted underneath his soft gaze. “That we fucked, multiple times.” His voice unintentionally came out in a low whisper. Taehyun’s heart was beating like crazy. As though it was trying to break out of his rib cage.</p>
<p>The door suddenly opened and Wooyoung stepped inside, seeing Beomgyu and Taehyun up against a wall with their faces very close together. The two of them stepped away from each other awkwardly, avoiding eye contact with the person who’d just arrived. “Me oh my, have I interrupted you and your…” He eyed them curiously. “Friend? Boyfriend?” Beomgyu shot him a look, trying not to make things any more uncomfortable for them. “Yeesh, sorry” He threw his hands up in surrender and let any other remarks his brain had cooked up stay silent.</p>
<p>Wooyoung went past them to his bed, unloading his bag onto the mattress and emptying it. Taehyun and Beomgyu stayed in the hallway, both silently wishing they would stop getting interrupted. “Let’s meet up tomorrow… and talk things over.” Beomgyu was tired of keeping up the facade. He may seem hard on the outside, but he was breaking inside. He needed to do something about this, he didn’t want to lose one of his friends.</p>
<p>“Sure…” Taehyun nodded slowly. “I should go.” He moved towards the door and exited the dorm. He stayed just outside for a few seconds, taking deep breaths, trying to calm down a bit. He looked forward to the day that would come, yet he dreaded it at the same time. He wasn’t sure what he hoped tomorrow would hold in store for him, but one word was etched in his mind. ‘Boyfriend’</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soft snowflakes were descending from the dark night sky. The cold air felt stuffy as Taehyun and Beomgyu strode towards the small coffee shop near the academy. The thin layer of snow laying upon the ground crunched under their feet as they walked. Soon they were welcomed by the warmth of the shop and its cozy ambiance.</p>
<p>The two boys walked up to the counter together in their winter clothes. “Two lattes please” Taehyun hurried to pay for them both, deciding he could at least do as much. They received a beeper and went over to a corner table, sitting down to wait for their coffees.</p>
<p>“I should apologise for my roommate, he’s like that” Beomgyu looked cautiously at Taehyun. They both remembered what they’d promised each other. The rules, for their agreement. So much has changed since then. They had changed.</p>
<p>“It’s alright.” Taehyun recalled the happenings of the previous day. Suddenly the beeper rang, just as Tae had opened his mouth to rid his shoulders of a heavy weight. Beomgyu gets to his feet and goes to the counter to get their order. He returned carrying the cups of coffee carefully, trying not to spill any of the warm liquid.</p>
<p>The pair sat in silence for a while, sipping at their coffees. Neither of them knew what to say or what to do. They hadn’t been alone together, for real, in a while. The minutes passed by and both finished their drinks. Feeling both warm inside and with a newfound energy.</p>
<p>Beomgyu glanced over at the boy sitting opposite him. His blonde hair had a pink tone in the red light of the shop. His eyes seemed to sparkle as they gazed out of the window into the dark night. Without knowing it, he found himself smiling fondly at this. Isn’t it strange how one single person can affect you so much?</p>
<p>“Should we leave?” Taehyun turned towards Beomgyu, facing him with newly found courage. The other boy nodded, both stood up and started putting on their outerwear again. Preparing for the drastic change in temperature which awaited them.</p>
<p>“By the way how did your date go last night?”</p>
<p>“My date?” Taehyun halted in his place, thinking back to the night before. Right, he hadn’t just gone to Beomgyu that day. “It… it didn’t work ou—“</p>
<p>“—Look what we have here,” That voice… That god awful voice, how had he found him again? Taehyun, who was standing closest to the door, noticed a tall, lean guy enter the small coffee shop. He had short black hair and his face was round. His eyes were kind of strange. One of the eyes had a green tint to it and the other a blue tint. “My sneaky little bitch.”</p>
<p>Beomgyu sprang to Taehyun’s side, resembling a rat in the presence of a cat. He found it harder to breathe with every second. Beomgyu reached a trembling hand towards Taehyun’s, hidden behind Tae’s torso. The blonde haired boy watched him with confusion. As their eyes met, he noticed the pure terror in Beomgyu’s eyes.</p>
<p>“You can stop with this game of yours and come with me,” the strange guy took a few steps towards the two of them, sneering at Beomgyu. Taehyun definitely understood that this person wasn’t nice. Judging by the way Beomgyu was clenching his hand around his own. “You belong to me.”</p>
<p>“He doesn’t belong to you,” Taehyun stepped in front of Beomgyu, shielding him from this person’s view. The guy glared at him, his eyes shot daggers. He looked dangerous. “I suggest you leave.”</p>
<p>“Who the hell are you? How dare you talk to me like that.” He took a menacing step towards Taehyun, cracking his knuckles loudly as he went. Beomgyu flinched behind him at the sound. </p>
<p>“I’m his boyfriend.” Taehyun squeezed Beomgyu’s trembling hand a little, stroking his thumb over the soft skin reassuringly. “Now leave him alone.” Taehyun drew himself to his maximum height. Trying to look tough and intimidating, fearing that this guy wouldn’t go away.</p>
<p>The guy glared at him with disgust and anger. Clearly not satisfied with the turn of events. Apparently deeming the situation to be much different than what he’d thought. He turned around and hastily stormed out of the shop, throwing the doors so hard that they slammed into the outside wall. The guy’s expression scared Taehyun, he looked at Beomgyu as if he was an object and not a human.</p>
<p>Taehyun turned around to see Beomgyu shaking, his head downcast. He looked completely broken. Something snapped inside Taehyun, not a chance was he going to let that guy get to Beomgyu again. Never again was he going to let him hurt his Beomgyu.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Remnants of the snowy weather could be seen on their coats as Beomgyu and Taehyun walked down the corridors of the boys’ dormitory building. Taehyun had refused to let go of Beomgyu’s hand, not that Beomgyu had asked him to, rather he forbade himself from letting go. He was leading them to his and Hueningkai’s dorm on the fourth floor. He hoped that that strange guy hadn’t gotten any information about where they stayed, and if he did he thought it would be safer for Beomgyu to stay in Taehyun’s dorm instead of his own. At least there he could protect him.</p>
<p>After a while they reached dorm 424 and Taehyun unlocked the door with his free hand. He made absolutely sure that the door closed and locked when they’d entered. You could call him paranoid, but he certainly had his reasons. Finally he felt they were somewhat safe.</p>
<p>The two of them removed their coats and went into the main area of the dorm, where the beds are. It seemed all dorms had the same layout, for this room looked exactly like Beomgyu’s did. “Where’s Kai?” Beomgyu looked around the room in search of their friend. Giving up and finally settling on one of the beds.</p>
<p>“He’s staying with Chohee tonight” Taehyun went to sit beside Beomgyu on his bed. He still seemed shaky, he was fiddling with his thumb where he sat. “Are you okay?”</p>
<p>“Not really…” Their eyes met. “Thank you, for back there. That was my ex, Kim Jaeho. And we don’t exactly have the best history.” Beomgyu’s voice was frail and his eyes gazed into Taehyun’s with sorrow. “He… he used to hit me… a lot.”</p>
<p>Taehyun’s chest began aching and he found he disliked this ´Kim Jaeho´ person even more. “Every day he found something to blame on me, giving himself an excuse to hit me. And if I wouldn’t do as he told me, he called me names and threatened to do… stuff…”</p>
<p>“One day I had just had enough, I ran away from the town I lived in and transferred to a different university in Japan. But he found me…” Beomgyu’s voice broke with the last words, tears started forming in his eyes. At this point he was full on shivering again. Taehyun reached over and embraced his crying friend, stroking his back in an attempt to calm him down.</p>
<p>“I realised that I couldn’t escape easily and I tried to k— I transferred here instead. But he found me again… I can’t escape…” Taehyun was absolutely speechless. Beomgyu’s story was heartbreaking to listen to. He was crying on Taehyun’s shoulder, staining his T-shirt with tears. But Taehyun did not care, not in the slightest. The only thing he cared about right now was Beomgyu.</p>
<p>“It’s okay, I’m here and I’m going to protect you, alright?” Beomgyu grabbed the fabric of Taehyun’s shirt and clenched his fists, he was sobbing quite loudly. Taehyun just tightened his embrace and continued stroking his back. “I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that…” After a while, Beomgyu’s sniffling turned into soft snores. His body went limp over Tae’s shoulder, still in his arms.</p>
<p>They stayed like that for a while, but Taehyun supposed he should be sleeping more comfortably in a bed. And so, he tucked Beomgyu into his own bed. He himself settled on the bed across from him, the one filled with stuffed animals. He thought he heard scuffling in the corridor outside the dorm, but after staying awake for twenty minutes of hearing nothing else, concluding that it was nothing, he fell asleep.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I actually can’t believe that 2000 people have read this. It seems absurd. But I’m so incredibly happy and I can’t even describe how I feel rn. Thank you all so much 🥺</p>
<p>I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Paper</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>It’s Wednesday my dudes</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A distant siren pierced the silence of the still, dark night. The low wailing flowed in through the open window of dorm 424, waking one of its inhabitants from his uneasy slumber. Beomgyu sat up on the soft mattress of the bed he’d been sleeping on. The faint light of the full moon shone in through the window, painting the room with a soft blue glow.</p>
<p>He glanced over at the opposite side of the room, to where another bed stood. A bed filled with stuffed animals and pillows. Among them laid a blonde boy covered with a blanket, breathing softly in the chilly air. So this was where Beomgyu was. Not in his own dorm, but in Taehyun and Hueningkai’s. Nonetheless he felt calm knowing he was not alone after all.</p>
<p>Judging by the tower of plushies surrounding his friend on the other bed, Beomgyu supposed he himself was resting on Taehyun’s bed. A strange feeling tickled his insides, like the fluttering wings of butterflies. He let his body fall backwards again, to rest his head on the pillow below him. And so he stayed for a while, focusing on the only sound in the room. However faint it may be, it made him feel safer. Those annoyingly cute breaths.</p>
<p>Beomgyu had known for quite some time now that he liked Taehyun. And not as mere friends or fuckbuddies. He wanted more than that. He wished he could hold Tae’s hand whenever he liked, without making him feel uncomfortable. He wished he could kiss him, and more than just as foreplay. Beomgyu wished he could tell him how he felt.</p>
<p>But he could never tell him. For doing so would risk everything they had built and rebuilt. Their frail friendship, only just saved from ruin, would surely not survive another blow like that. There was no hope for reciprocation, for Taehyun could never love Beomgyu the way he wished he could. Besides, that would go against their promise wouldn’t it? Not to catch feelings.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Da🐬 Da🐬 Da🐬 Da🐬<br/>Monday, Dec 28</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ning Ning<br/>“Hey guys”<br/>“I’m trying to figure out how to tell Chohee that I love her, but I don’t know how ㅠㅠ”<br/>“I need your help, what should I do?”</p>
<p>BAMgyu<br/>“:0”</p>
<p>Yeonnie~<br/>“Omg-”<br/>“Our baby is growing up 🥺”</p>
<p>Soobinnie<br/>“You love her?”<br/>“That’s great Kai :D”</p>
<p>Ning Ning<br/>“Yeah yeah I know”<br/>“But focus”<br/>“What should I do?”</p>
<p>Yeonnie~<br/>“Oh sh-“<br/>“Right”</p>
<p>Soobinnie <br/>“Give her flowers?”<br/>“Girls like flowers don’t they?”</p>
<p>Ning Ning<br/>“Yeah but I want to do something that’s more special than just giving her flowers”</p>
<p>Yeonnie~<br/>“I like flowers”</p>
<p>Soobinnie<br/>“Then I don’t know”<br/>“Maybe you could buy her a necklace or something?”</p>
<p>Teahyun<br/>“Give her a sock”</p>
<p>BAMgyu<br/>“Sjksjsk”</p>
<p>Ning Ning<br/>“I-“<br/>“No”<br/>“You know what, I’ll just figure something out on my own.”</p>
<p>Soobinnie<br/>“Sorry Huening :/“</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Disappointed, Hueningkai put his phone back in his pocket. He’d left his dorm twenty minutes ago with the intention of getting something special for his girlfriend. Whether that would be a necklace, a flower bouquet or a sock, apparently, he didn’t know. Currently he was walking down a street full of stores and other public places. </p>
<p>To his left there was a small building with well lit windows with multiple different jewellery on display. There were fancy rings, bracelets and necklaces baiting bypassers into the store. A golden necklace amongst only silver caught Hueningkai’s eye. It had a small gem encircled with golden leaves. It glistened like water in sunlight under the bright light of the store windows.</p>
<p>Hope rose within him as he watched the beautiful necklace. Maybe this would be the perfect gift for the occasion? He decided to enter the store, set on buying it as it surely would be a bit more special than just flowers. Perhaps he should get flowers too? ‘One thing at a time’ he thought as he walked up to the counter where a middle aged woman stood, eyeing him.</p>
<p>“Excuse me, how much is the golden necklace by the window?” Kai pointed to the display he’d been looking at moments earlier. He had never been to this particular jewellry store before. And if he had, he would probably never have returned. He’d been so mesmerized by the necklace that he’d failed to notice the price tags. For absolutely nothing in the entire store, would go for any less than 1.000.000 won.</p>
<p>“Oh, a fine choice young man. That is the necklace of freding,” The woman clasped her hands together, speaking with enthusiasm clear in her voice. She went to get the necklace from the display and held it up in front of him. “It’s 3.000.000 won” The gem glistened even brighter now it seemed, as if it was mocking his lack of money. His heart sank. What had he expected anyways? How could a necklace as beautiful as this one not be worth a bunch of money? He felt the burning gaze of the saleswoman still on him. Hueningkai pretended as though he was pondering on whether to buy it or not. When in reality he had only one choice.</p>
<p>“Actually, I changed my mind. I think I’ll go with something else” He bowed to the woman and thanked her nonetheless before exiting the store. Great. What was he supposed to do now? After having experienced such a great contender for a gift, how could anything else compare? It was probably best to just give up. Perhaps he could do it like people do in movies. Just say it. Kai felt ashamed of himself. The greatest thing to happen to him in a long time, and he can’t even do it right. He wanted to give Chohee something worth the occasion. Something that would suffice in expressing how grateful he was that she’s in his life. Something that’s good enough for her.</p>
<p>He continued walking down the street. The chilly air bit at his nose like ice. It was below zero degrees outside, and it had been for the last couple of days. Resulting in glazy ice spots on the ground. The snow, which had previously covered every surface outside, had long since melted. As if it had never been there at all. </p>
<p>On his walk around the city he stumbled upon the arcade where him and Chohee had shared their first date. Kai smiled when he thought back to that day. He remembered how energetic Chohee had been, dashing around while trying all the different games. It had been the start of something amazing. Suddenly he thought of something else.</p>
<p>Towards the end of their first date, Chohee had been trying to win a plushie from the claw machines. More specifically a purple penguin. And she’d been very disappointed when losing. What if those penguins were still in there, waiting to be won? Hueningkai hurried inside the arcade, searching for the claw machines. There were four of them placed back to back, by the entrance. And to Kai’s delight, one of them still held the same prize.</p>
<p>He inserted a coin into the slot and steered the claw over one of the penguins. He pressed the button and hoped the claw would find its mark, and actually take a hold of it. Surprisingly, it did. The claw closed around the purple penguin and moved back to its original position. It released the prize and Kai grabbed it from the machine.</p>
<p>The plushie was soft to his touch and the colour was vibrant. Hueningkai imagined his girlfriend’s excited face as he gave it to her. The thing which she had wanted so long ago, on their first date. This single, insignificant seeming thing has a personal connection to them that no necklace or sock could ever hold. It was perfect.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rapid knocks woke Taehyun from his light sleeping inside his dorm. He turned around in his bed, searching for the clock on his nightstand. The numbers upon the display shone brightly towards his tired eyes, showing 03:24. He groaned as he realized it was still in the middle of the night. Another series of knocks came from the door and he was reminded of why he’d been disturbed from his sleeping state. He glanced over at his roommate who was still deeply asleep. Hueningkai was lying sprawled out on his mattress, hugging a plushie resembling a penguin that Tae had not seen before. Some new addition to the family he supposed. </p>
<p>Taehyun stood up from his bed and walked over to the entrance. He swung the door open, ready to bark at whoever had woken him from his beauty sleep, but was surprised to see who stood waiting on the other side. It was Beomgyu. He was wearing a pair of chequered pyjama pants and a black long sleeved sweatshirt. His hair was messy and his teary eyes looked back at Taehyun. He looked as though he was shivering from cold, yet Tae had a feeling it had nothing to do with temperature.</p>
<p>“I saw him i-”</p>
<p>“What?! You saw him?” As soon as the words had registered inside Taehyun’s brain, anxiety washed over him like a tsunami. He cast his head in both directions of the hallway they were in, but nothing could be seen or heard. “Where?” He focused his gaze on Beomgyu, who was looking rather shocked.</p>
<p>“In a dream,” Beomgyu’s voice was quiet, barely audible in the even quieter surrounding. Tae felt relieved, yet still an uncomfortable feeling gnawed at his insides. He felt uneasy, even though he knew the building was secure. “He was just standing there, watching me. But it felt so real…” His voice came out in a whimper, a few tears falling from his cheeks. Taehyun reached out and pulled the boy close to himself. Feeling a sense of responsibility.</p>
<p>“How about we get some fresh air?” Beomgyu nodded against his chest, inhaling deeply then exhaling. Taehyun turned back inside the dorm, opening one of the closets keeping his coats and shoes. He grabbed two of his long coats, a beanie and a knitted scarf. “Here” Tae held out the clothes to Beomgyu, keeping only one of the coats for himself. Taehyun wanted to leave the dorm and show Beomgyu his special place. Not only to help him calm down, but also to not risk waking up Kai. Who’s snores could still be heard from inside.</p>
<p>The two boys held hands as they exited the building together, Taehyun leading Beomgyu through the cold dark night. They neared the old part of the academy, the west wing. The entrance stood tall before them, welcoming their presence. After passing the gateway, Tae turned left in the frozen grass and led Beomgyu through a forest of flowers and bushes. Their path continued to a small glade where a big tree stood.</p>
<p>“What is this place?” Beomgyu watched Taehyun as he walked towards the tree trunk. As he neared it, he laid down in the grass, beckoning Beomgyu to do the same. And so he also laid down on the ground, beside his friend.</p>
<p>“I go here at night sometimes, when I need to be alone” The two boys looked into each other's eyes, sharing in the deep connection they’d developed. “This is the first time I’ve shown this place to anyone.” It felt as if Beomgyu’s heart did a flip inside his ribcage. He’d completely forgotten the nightmare which had caused him to go to Taehyun in the first place. Now his mind was only focusing on the fact that he was with him, and it made him feel happier. </p>
<p>Taehyun pointed to the open sky, which was filled with many small dots of light. Some shining brighter than others. The stars were always visible from this place, and was the reason as to why Taehyun liked it so much. For he could spend hours upon hours just gazing up at the night sky. When he’s there, he feels he can be whoever he wants and whatever he wants to be. Without having to worry about what other people think. He gets to shut out the world for a while, and only focus on the pale beauty of the stars. For they don’t care about simple human habits and their identity. From their point of view, everyone is just small insignificant life forms that inhabit the planet called earth.</p>
<p>Taehyun gazed fondly upon his friend as he lay beside him, watching the stars he so often did himself. Their faint light reflected in Beomgyu’s eyes, creating small galaxies of his own. In this moment, lying side by side with Beomgyu, he finally came to terms with the turmoil he’d been tortured by for months. He finally accepted it, however strange it felt to him. Finally, after all this time, Taehyun’s heart and mind were telling him the same thing. ‘I like him…’.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“This is the first time I’ve shown this place to anyone.” </p>
<p>The voice of that annoying blonde boy echoed between the walls encircling the garden of the old building. Kang Taehyun, that fool. Why did he have to destroy everything? Why did he have to steal my Beomgyu away from me? Curse him. Kim Jaeho retreated from his spot behind a bush, walking away from the couple lying on the ground. ‘I swear, I will come back. I will get Beomgyu back. Whatever it takes…’.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Merry Christmas and Happy new year everyone! I know I’m a bit late to say it but I hope everyone had a good time nonetheless :D</p>
<p>Anyways I hope you liked this chapter :)</p>
<p>(Also I know it’s not Wednesday)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Hearts</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>✨Feelin’ good✨<br/>✨like I should✨</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The quiet ambience of the coffee shop surrounded the group of five teenage boys as they sat around a table, drinking coffee together. They’d decided to meet up before going to the party that was to be held later that day. You know, New Years Eve is usually really big and to celebrate the oncoming year there’d be drinking and dancing. Just having fun together with a bunch of strangers. Sounds good right? Well, you could call this the quiet before the storm. You never know what to expect at these parties. Last year someone got so incredibly drunk that they threw up on almost everyone right before the countdown to midnight. It completely ruined the mood.</p>
<p>“Where is it again?” Beomgyu, who was spending his first semester as a student at the academy, had never been to any of the previous parties. And therefore, he did not know that they were always held in the same place every year. </p>
<p>“You know the old building by the school? The west wing? It’s usually held right outside the parameters of it,” Yeonjun took a sip of his coffee and explained. Oh he knew the west wing alright. “We’re not actually allowed inside the property since it’s really old and kind of important I guess, but no matter. There’ll be lots to drink and loads of hot guys to woo” Yeonjun added with an attempted wink, earning a smack on his shoulder from his boyfriend Soobin, and a rather icy glare from Taehyun which went unnoticed by all of them.</p>
<p>“Oh okay..” Beomgyu was not in the mood to get into the whole ‘not looking for a guy to ‘woo’’ ordeal. For he knew that it’d get too complicated and stressful to explain so he decided to just stay silent. “Anyways, are we going there together or should we just meet there?”</p>
<p>“Well, Soobin and I are getting ready together,” Yeonjun spoke again, giving a suggestive look to his boyfriend, raising his eyebrows and pouting his lips slightly. To which Soobin did the opposite, frowning and adopting a rather puzzled expression. “And we’ll probably want to go there together as well” Yeonjun sighed and gave up in trying to signal what he was after.</p>
<p>“And I’ll be going over to Chohee’s place later” Kai voiced, now turning the attention to him. He decided to keep his plan to bring the penguin with him to himself. They didn’t need to know yet, plus, he just didn’t have the energy to tell them at the moment. Beomgyu felt a little disappointed yet somehow grateful for the outcome. It’s not like he’d been hoping that his friends wouldn’t go together as a group. However, it gave him the perfect excuse.</p>
<p>“Taehyun, would you like to get ready with me then? Since the other guys will be going by themselves and I don’t know the way there.” Taehyun looked up from his mug, albeit slightly surprised at the proposal. Nonetheless his heart sped up it’s pace in content, nodding at Beomgyu. “Be at my dorm at around 18:30 then”</p>
<p>“Sure” Tae smiled unintentionally but didn’t do anything to hinder his action from being seen. It wouldn’t be considered weird right? From the others point of view, they were just two bros chilling. Nothing weird at all. Yet the eyes of the blue haired boy was ever watchful, and just so happening to catch the tiniest of details. Even as tiny as a friendly smile between ‘friends’.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>‘18:11’ No matter how many times Beomgyu diverted his gaze towards the clock standing on his bedside table, time never seemed to pass. He’d gotten back to his dorm a while ago, deciding to take a stroll around the city since he had nothing to do anyways. And now he was just waiting for his friend Taehyun to show up so they could get ready for the party. Maybe he could decide what to wear beforehand? And so Beomgyu started digging through his wardrobe, looking for clothes that were nice yet not too nice. In case he’d get puked on for example. </p>
<p>The tiny dorm wardrobe could barely fit all of his pieces of clothing, most of which just lay folded at the bottom. This contributed to his closet being an absolute mess. Perhaps he shouldn’t have brought so much with him when he moved in. Among the stuff that was lucky enough to hang, was the coat he’d borrowed from Taehyun the night they went to the gardens. The fabric was incredibly soft and warm, like a comforting hug on a cold winter day. He held the sleeve up to his nose and savoured the sweet scent that emitted from it. A scent which stood out amongst his own clothes, yet even more welcome than any of them.</p>
<p>Ever since this morning, Beomgyu had been feeling hot. And not in a ‘badass bitch’ kind of way. Although he wouldn’t deny that he often found himself admiring his own reflection when he got the chance. Rather he was in the mood, and I expect you understand what that means. And considering the fact that he would be attending a party that would most likely go on well into the night, and he looked forward to drinking his own weight in alcohol. Making this his best opportunity for some action. And a great way to pass the time if you asked him.</p>
<p>When he started out, it was nothing more than a regular jerk off. He could in no way have anticipated what was about to take place. Beomgyu went back towards the main area of his dorm and removed his pants and underwear, settling down in his bed. He began stroking himself slowly, focusing on the most sensitive spot. Sure it felt good, but he craved more. He craved friction. So he reached for the bottle of lube on his bedside table, which was very discreetly hidden if I may add. Definitely not already found by his roommate months prior.</p>
<p>He flipped open the cap and squirted an amount of the liquid onto his hand. When he reunited it with his dick he repeated his previous movements, stroking the tip once again, now with a cool touch to his fingers. After this he started going up and down on the shaft, going faster with each second passing. He felt the tension, which had previously resided in his shoulders, leave him. To be replaced by a warm feeling, spreading all over him. Stretching to and fro every limb through his veins.</p>
<p>In his current state of bliss he allowed himself to let out sounds of pleasure. Feeling a sense of security being locked inside his dorm room alone, or so he thought. Soon his moaning became so loud, effectively blocking out every sound nearby from reaching his ears. He was too focused on the pleasure he was giving himself, firing bullets of serotonin to his brain. It controlled him, powering down all of his senses into low drive. In the midst of all this, Beomgyu failed to notice when the door opened and a boy entered the room.</p>
<p>Beomgyu thought of Taehyun and his pretty cheeks. Primarily those on his beautiful face which he so often got the privilege of turning a shade of pink. He imagined the other boy being there, touching him and making him feel good. Those plump pink lips that so perfectly fit around his cock. He remembered how he always makes those cute gagging noises whenever he’s sucking him off. “Taehyun…” Unable to stop himself, Beomgyu whined as he thought.</p>
<p>A wave of pleasure washed over Beomgyu as he lay in his bed, driving himself closer to the edge. Constantly releasing groans and moaning as he tired himself out. Suddenly the sound of the door locking, hit him. Immediately he halted what he was doing, trying to be as quiet as he could muster in order to listen, but was betrayed by his lungs. He couldn’t hear anything other than the sound of his own breathing. Perhaps he had imagined it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Taehyun made his way down the corridor of the third floor. He was on his way to Beomgyu’s dorm so that they could get ready together. Although he was a little earlier than they’d agreed, he hoped Beomgyu wouldn’t mind. Since Tae had had absolutely nothing else to do and was bored out of his mind, he’d decided to leave 15 minutes early. That couldn’t hurt right? If anything it would allow them more time together before having to leave for the party. </p>
<p>As he neared dorm number 311 he noticed that the door wasn’t closed, it stood slightly ajar letting a tiny ray of light escape from the room. He supposed Beomgyu had left the door open for him so that he didn’t need to knock. Taehyun grabbed the handle and pulled the door open, closing it completely this time. Something strange dawned on him, he heard moaning coming from further into the room. At first he thought he’d entered the wrong dorm and panicked. Until he noticed that it was Beomgyu’s voice he was hearing. Was he pleasuring himself?</p>
<p>Noises resembling skin slapping against skin filled the room, as well as Beomgyu’s moans. Taehyun would be lying if he said he wasn’t a little turned on by the sounds. He’d always had a soft spot for Beomgyu’s whiny breathing as Taehyun pleasured him. He somehow felt proud of making the person he liked feel good. It was like music to his ears, sweet notes that seeped into his brain. “Taehyun…” A swarm of butterflies erupted in his stomach as the boy moaned his name. Was he aware that he was there? Tae couldn’t resist anymore, he reached for the door and locked it. The little musical tune of the lock played and everything else went silent. Now Beomgyu definitely knew that Tae was there. Deciding it was unnecessary to stay by the door, he removed his shoes and krept towards the living area of the dorm. </p>
<p>When he turned the corner, Beomgyu appeared in his view and Tae in his. The moment their eyes met, Beomgyu jumped to cover himself with a blanket, trying to hide his pink throbbing dick. His face heated up in an instance when he realised that he’d been caught. But it was too late to try to hide what he had been doing. Taehyun however, had no intention of ridiculing him. Far from it in fact. “Mind if I join you?”</p>
<p>“What?” Taehyun raised an eyebrow at him. Beomgyu had actually understood what Tae had meant. He’d slipped the word in surprise, perhaps in a desperate attempt to deny the situation. But he couldn’t deny that he was grateful that it had been Taehyun who walked in on him, and not his roommate. “Okay” he answered while nodding, reaching towards Taehyun’s pants. Beomgyu began unbuckling Taehyun’s belt and grabbed for the zipper, pulling it down.</p>
<p>“Beomie, what if we did it for real?”</p>
<p>“What do you mean?” Beomgyu stopped what he was doing and looked up at Taehyun. He looked as if he was deep in thought. Tae then bit his lip and met Beomgyu’s gaze. A lustful fire in his eyes.</p>
<p>“Fuck me” They’d never gone that far before. Beomgyu had thought Tae wouldn’t like it. But at the request his insides fluttered like a baby bird desperately flapping its wings while falling towards the ground, just learning how to fly. Beomgyu grabbed Taehyun’s hand and dragged him onto the bed. Tae straddled him with one leg on either side of his lap.</p>
<p>Their lips crash together as though they were magnets. Beomgyu rested his hands on Taehyun’s waist while Taehyun held Beomgyu’s face between his. Constantly pressing their lips together. Tae licked Beom’s top lip, asking for entrance with his tongue, which he was permitted. They explored each other’s mouths and battled for dominance. </p>
<p>Beomgyu broke the kiss, leaving both of them panting for air. He then continued to trail kisses down Taehyun’s jaw and neck. He stopped in his place once Taehyun’s whining grew louder, sucking on his soft skin, intending to leave a mark. In his haze of lust and love for the boy, he forgot all about their situation. And that it probably wouldn’t be ideal for him to give the other hickeys. But for all he cared, in this moment, Taehyun was his.</p>
<p>Gyu reached for the hem of Tae’s shirt and started pulling, receiving help from the other. And then they did the same for him. Beomgyu hoists Taehyun up and flips them so that he’s on top. He then continues trailing kisses down from Tae’s neck, stopping to suck on his left nipple. He swirled his tongue around it. The blonde boy went crazy under his touch. Each and every one of them sent sparks through his body while he let out soft moans.</p>
<p>Beomgyu then returned to his pants and began pulling them down along with his underwear. Taehyun was nervous, he’d never done this before. Sure him and Beomgyu had done stuff, but never this. “Does it hurt..?” Beom met his gaze with those sweet brown eyes, calming him slightly.</p>
<p>“It does at first,” Taehyun sat up, searching for reassurance from his mate. Beomgyu put a warm hand on his cheek, pulling him in for another kiss. “But it goes away, I promise” Tae trusted he was telling the truth. Afterall there had to be at least some appeal for both parties if sex would be enjoyable. He let himself fall backwards against the mattress again, giving Beomgyu the ability to continue.</p>
<p>He reached for the lube bottle for the second time that night, putting some on his fingers. To begin with he entered one finger through the tight muscle, bending it as he went. His other hand was placed on Taehyun’s pelvis. Tae flinched when he made contact, slowly getting used to the feeling. Beomgyu then entered a second finger and stretched the muscle even more. At this point Tae was starting to enjoy the contact, silently wanting Beom to add a third finger. Instead, he started going in and out, causing Tae to stiffen. It hurt, yet it felt good? He arched his back, pushing closer to Beomgyu. Moaning even louder than before, he barely noticed when a third finger was added.</p>
<p>“I think that should do,” Beomgyu pulled out his fingers, leaving Tae with a strangely empty feeling. He was stretched out and ready for the real thing. He felt nervous again, for that had only been a taste of it. Perhaps the pain would be tenfold compared to what he’d just experienced. Beomgyu reached for his bag leaning against the bed on the floor. Pulling out a condom and putting it on himself. He looked at Taehyun, asking for permission as he positioned himself at his entrance. Tae nodded, sure he wanted this. Sure he wanted Beomgyu.</p>
<p>With that, he pushed in until their hips met. Taehyun groaned as the pain, as expected, returned and worse than before. His eyes stung as a tear rolled down his cheek. Beomgyu stayed still to let Tae adjust to his size once more. In the meantime he bent forward, grasping the other’s hands and pressing his lips on the tear rolling down his face. Anything he could do to comfort Taehyun stood high on his priority list. “Please keep going…” Tae’s voice came out as a whisper, right beside Beomgyu’s ear.</p>
<p>And he obliged, starting to move his hips slowly. Making sure not to cause pain for the other. Taehyun’s breathing got heavier, whimpers escaping along with his breaths. Beomgyu attached himself onto Tae’s neck, sucking on the same spot as before. As the seconds passed, Taehyun’s whimpering turned into moaning. Beomgyu quickened his pace, going faster and harder.</p>
<p>Both of them loved the feeling of the other. Skin against skin, all the while holding each other close. Savoring each other’s scents, wanting to be able to smell it at all times. But that reality was far away from them. Yet not unreachable. Their moans blended together as one and rose higher as Beomgyu went deeper and harder. Accidentally hitting Taehyun’s g-spot, leaving him squirming and arching his back. In order to keep himself steady he clinged on to Beomgyu’s back. Their movements grew more out of rhythm as both of them chased after their orgasms.</p>
<p>“B..Beomie..”</p>
<p>“Hm?”</p>
<p>“Mm c..comi-” Taehyun found himself unable to finish his sentence. His g-spot being continually abused definitely affected his ability to speak and brought him closer to the edge with every pound. Beomgyu went even faster, aiming to release at the same time. Succeeding within seconds, releasing his orgasm inside Taehyun while he came, untouched, on his stomach. </p>
<p>Beomgyu pulled out and threw away the used condom, laying down beside Taehyun. Both of them were out of breath and sweating from their physical activity. They stay like that for a while, enjoying the warmth of each other’s bodies against their own. Before remembering that they were expected to show up at the party later, and would have to put on some clothes. </p>
<p>And so Beomgyu stood up and carried Taehyun to the bathroom where he cleaned them both. Preferring to not smell like sweat and dry cum when arriving at the party. Beomgyu searched for Taehyun’s clothes which had previously been thrown god knows where inside the dorm. Instead he settled on getting a clean pair of clothes for the two of them out of his own wardrobe, loaning Taehyun his favourite blouse and dress pants.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Laughter and loud music blared all around the place as midnight neared, and with it the new year. Currently, Beomgyu was standing near his group of friends, all drinking and dancing while enjoying each other’s company. Perhaps Beomgyu had had one too many drinks this evening, for he found himself pondering on the thought that so often plagued his mind. And yet he never allowed himself to think about it if he could.</p>
<p>Taehyun, his friend, who he so often found himself staring at. The sheer beauty of his never failed to amaze him. How someone could be so cute, nice and comfortable to be with was beyond him. And he would always count himself lucky to have been able to meet and be a part of his life. </p>
<p>The relationship the two boys shared, may to a normal person appear stupid and bad for them. And they’d be right in saying so, for it was true. Every minute of every day Beomgyu spent with Taehyun, he was in pain. Not physically, something much much worse. The type of pain that leaves even the strongest person broken. </p>
<p>They say drunk sayings are sober thoughts. And perhaps there’s something to that. Had it not been for the alarming amount of alcohol he’d consumed, he probably never would’ve built up the courage to decide what he’d need to do. For never in his right mind would he ever consider this an option.</p>
<p>Beomgyu downed another glass of alcohol and wiped his mouth on his sleeve. Kissing and hooking up with Taehyun damaged him. And lately, just being with Taehyun hurt him. For he knew that this was all there would ever be between them. He knew they would never have a real relationship. But he could no longer ignore his feelings.</p>
<p>“Three!”</p>
<p>Beomgyu tapped Taehyun on his shoulder, gaining his attention. “Let’s end this,” Taehyun looked at him with confusion. “This, us. Let’s just stop.”</p>
<p>“Two!”</p>
<p>“What? Why are you saying this?” Tae took a step closer, trying to reason with the drunk boy. Beomgyu just stepped back, not wanting to get tempted, he’d gone down a path and had no intention of turning back now. “You’ve been drinking, let’s talk about this tomorrow when we can think straight, okay?”</p>
<p>“One!”</p>
<p>“No.” Beomgyu took another step backwards, once again running away. “If I don’t do it now I don’t think I’ll ever be able to.”</p>
<p>“Please Beomgyu, don’t leave me…” The brown haired boy turned away from Taehyun, leaving the party. Leaving his friends, leaving his Taehyun. ‘What did I do wrong…’</p>
<p>“Happy new year!”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you liked this chapter :)<br/>Also I’m sorry, I may have made myself cry while writing this lol</p>
<p>Anyways, It’s snowing here and I’m happy bc we rarely get snow anymore :D</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Song</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Did you miss me &gt;)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Soobin was standing outside the west garden together with his friends and a bunch of other random people who attended the academy. Students were scattered all over the empty grounds, where music blasted through the air as they all waited for midnight to strike. He had a glass of champagne in his hand, having bought a bottle earlier that day for them all to share. Feeling it was appropriate for something a bit fancier than soju or beer. However, his friend Beomgyu had brought his own supply of all sorts of different alcohol, also for them all to share.</p>
<p>A little bit to the side of where they were gathered, he could see Hueningkai with his girlfriend. He was handing her something Soobin couldn’t make out, it looked dark blue or maybe purple from where he stood. It was difficult to tell in the dark and from such a distance. Chohee seemed to become really happy because of this though and brought her hands up to her mouth. He could hear a faint mumble of Hueningkai’s voice, saying something to her. Whatever he’d told her must’ve made her even happier. She reached out and hugged him tightly. It was nice seeing them so happy together, he felt like a proud mom watching his son grow up.</p>
<p>“Baby, they’re gonna begin the countdown soon.” Yeonjun came up to him, hugging him from behind. Soobin nodded and together they walked towards the largest group of people. They all stood in a circle around multiple different fireworks that students had brought with them. And they were all going to be lit for the new year. A few students were handing out sparklers to the crowd, working as an opener for the grand show. </p>
<p>As the countdown began, a student walked towards the center of the circle with a lighter. The task of lighting the first and opening fireworks bestowed upon them. The fuse was lit and the student ran back to join their friends in the circle, as everyone waited eagerly. “Three, two, one! Happy New Year!!” The firework shot up into the dark sky, blowing up in bursts of red and gold. Yeonjun pulled Soobin in for a kiss, holding him close by the waist. Their third new year’s spent together, and hopefully with many more to come.</p>
<p>Soobin had no idea how to express how much Yeonjun meant to him. For there were no words that could come close to describing how he felt towards him. How he made him feel when nothing else made sense to him. How he would always make sure he was alright when they hadn’t seen each other for a while. Those times when life is giving you a hard time and everything just feels hopeless. In those moments when he would extend his hand and bring him back into the light. Making him realize that, everything would, in fact, be alright. In the end.</p>
<p>The two of them pulled away from their kiss, embracing each other in the cold night. “I love you…” Yeonjun gazed into his eyes lovingly, reflecting the light of the colorful explosions of red, green, and pink above them. “I love you too” For a while they stayed in each other’s arms, enjoying the comfort and warmth they brought. Taehyun walked towards the couple wobbling slightly, stumbling in the thin layer of snow that covered the ground. His face was blank and expressionless, not even lifting his eyes from the ground. Soobin supposed he’d had one too many drinks that night and had gotten a headache from the loud music. If he’d noticed the tears silently streaming down the blonde boy’s face he probably would’ve guessed something else. He’d probably have noticed the fact that Beomgyu was no longer with them. For Taehyun was not drunk, nor did the music bother him. However, there was no denying that he was in pain.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A biting frost was carried with the fierce wind, leaving anything that stood in its way frozen. With the new year, a storm had risen from the east and had brought a powerful downpour of snow to fall upon the city. The ground was completely white, contrasting to the darkness which surrounded Taehyun as he lay in the snow. His clothes wrapped around him like a warm hug, shielding him from the cold air. Yet he did not feel warm, nor did he feel cold. He felt as though he wasn’t there, as if his body was nonexistent. His soul, trapped in an inescapable abyss, feeling nothing. Emptiness, the only solid thing he knew. Like an old friend, it welcomed him into its grace. The stars which surrounded him with their pale light seemed to have faded since his last tryst in the moonlight. Like him, they seemed distant and doleful as they floated in nothingness. </p>
<p>Taehyun hadn’t seen Beomgyu since that day. Only a week had passed, yet it felt like ages. It was like he’d just disappeared from the face of the earth. The others had asked him if he knew what had happened and why he’d gone. To which he always responded with the same downcast headshake. Tae did no longer care about hiding his emotions from them. Because nothing mattered anymore. He no longer found joy in the things that once drove him forward.</p>
<p>Taehyun had broken the one and only rule of their agreement. And he was aware of that. Catching feelings was perhaps the stupidest thing he could’ve done, for he lost his friend in the process. And he knew that it was because of him that Beomgyu ended things between them. When he’d taken their relationship for granted and acted like his boyfriend. He realized now that he’d been in the wrong when doing those things. Awkward hugs, kisses, and handholding. Those had never been a part of their agreement, and yet Taehyun had forced them upon his friend. It was his fault.</p>
<p>In truth, things had become quite difficult for him. He’d struggled to hold his feelings at bay. And for what? Trying to strengthen their connection and bring them closer together, only ended up driving them further apart. He regretted ever agreeing to become friends with benefits in the first place. Regretted that first kiss and those innocent glances whenever they could spare them. But he could never bring himself to actually admit it. He did not want to regret it, he didn’t want any of it. He just wished that everything could go back to the way it had been before the party. Perhaps things would have been different now would he have confessed his attraction before it was too late. But for some reason, he had never been worried. Some part of him had believed that maybe Beomgyu liked him back.</p>
<p>Suddenly a ringing tune brought him back to where he lay in the gardens of the west wing. His phone was vibrating in his coat pocket. Taehyun sat up slowly, taking out his phone. ‘Unknown caller’ He hesitated for a second, wondering if he should pick up or not. Finally deciding that he would, getting ready for a prank call or something of the sort. “Hello?” Nothing could be heard from the other end for a few seconds, except faint breathing into the microphone. The voice that greeted him gave him chills. He recognized the foul, unnerving voice, but he could not place it.</p>
<p>“I think we need to talk. Come to this address,” his phone vibrated in his hand, retracting it from his ear and opening the notification. ‘28-11, Yeouido-dong, Yeongdeungpo-gu’ He knew that neighborhood, it wasn’t far from where his parents lived. He had driven past the many warehouses in the area with his dad once. He also knew that most of them were abandoned and stood empty since a long time ago. He grew wary, proceeding with the phone call with caution.</p>
<p>“Who are you?”</p>
<p>“I think you’ll want to do as I say…” The man paused, a strange clinking sound emitted from the other end. “Otherwise, who knows what might happen…” Another notification drew his attention, this time it was a picture. Taehyun could in no way have anticipated what he was about to witness. When he opened the photo his stomach lurched. The sight before him shocked and horrified him to his core. He’d always liked watching detective dramas when he was growing up. The thrill of figuring out a perfect crime made him feel unstoppable. Yet now, when he was faced with the danger himself, he could not contain his fear.</p>
<p>In front of him, he could see Beomgyu. The picture was clearly fixated upon him. He was sitting in a metal chair inside a huge empty room. It was lit with a bright white light coming from behind the camera, pointing right at Beom’s body. But the thing which terrified Taehyun was the fact that he was tied to it. A large metal chain was wrapped around his body and the chair, preventing him from moving even slightly. His shirt was ripped in certain places with clearly visible bruises and his head was hanging backward, duct tape covering his mouth.</p>
<p>The photo sickened him, realizing who he was talking to. Finally, the unsettling voice clicked as he remembered that day at the coffee shop. Beomgyu’s ex must be a complete psychopath. Jaeho snickered into the phone, making every hair on Taehyun’s body stand upright. How dare he? Tae knew what he had to do. Even though every red flag was going off in his mind, he couldn’t waste even another second. He knew going there could mean risking his own life. But Beomgyu’s life was in danger, and he’d do anything to protect him. Anything.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Uhm, so that happened...</p>
<p>Hi guys, this chapter took a turn hehe<br/>I hope you liked it and I hope you'll look forward to next week's chapter!</p>
<p>Also if you got my Sherlock reference, I love you :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Cry</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Ooh, how’ll it go do you reckon? Maybe someone dies? Maybe not 🤷 Idk</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The wind blew in Beomgyu’s ears as he hurried down the dark, narrow alleyway. The hour was late and the cold air of early January felt like nothing before. Perhaps the cold felt more extreme because he was alone. And not in the way as he was walking home by himself. He was lonely, he hated to admit it but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t. Ever since new year’s eve he’d tried to avoid the group, especially Taehyun. For he was not in the mood to try to explain to Soobin and the others, nor was he ready to face the beautiful face of the boy he liked. Taehyun’s voice had sounded broken that night, mirroring the way he himself had felt. But he was sure he had imagined it. After all he hadn’t been in a very good state. Yeah, that must be it.</p><p>It was for the better though. If he’d held on to the thin string of hope he’d woven for himself, he would’ve only ended up destroying their friendship once again. It was better this way. Beomgyu could suffer his faults alone now, rather than building them up on a foundation that was sure to break one way or the other. The sooner he could get over himself the better. For both of their sakes. </p><p>A dark figure stood at the edge of the alleyway Beomgyu had to pass in order to return to the dormitory. It stood like a looming shadow, waiting for its prey to pounce on. Beomgyu however, couldn't care less. The person was surely just out on a nightly walk, like he was. As he got closer, the features became more apparent. The figure was pretty tall and muscular looking. But there was something about the way they stood that seemed familiar to Beomgyu.</p><p>“Hello there, little mouse.” Beomgyu froze mid step. That rough voice still sent chills down his spine. Beom felt even colder now, he could not move an inch from where he stood completely alone with his ex. His body started shaking, as Jaeho stepped closer. This time he had no one with him, no one was there to protect him. He feared he would have to give in to his fate, for he knew what Jaeho could do, and had already done. </p><p>“My, why do you look so scared?” Jaeho reached out a hand and moved a strand of hair behind Beomgyu’s ear. At this point he stopped breathing, he did not want to get back with him. He didn’t want to be near him. He wished someone else was there with them, someone who could stop him and keep him away. Jaeho snickered at the pathetic boy standing in front of him. Not daring to say a word against him, as usual. As he should. “Now, you’ll be coming with me. And it’s best if you forget about that idiot of a boyfriend, it’ll be best for you.” At those words, something snapped inside Beomgyu. He felt as though he could move, as though he could speak again.</p><p>“Leave Taehyun out of this.” He would not let Jaeho control him any longer, he wouldn’t let him speak badly of his Taehyun. Although he was terrified, he wouldn’t let him. Their eyes met and something in the look Jaeho was giving him told him that he’d made the wrong move. The boy advanced and pushed Beomgyu into the brick wall of the alley. He let out that cold laugh that made every hair on Beomgyu’s body rise.</p><p>“You should’ve listened the first time baby boy.” He felt a sharp blow delivered to his lower abdomen, losing his breath. Jaeho threw another punch towards the same place. Beomgyu tried to avoid it but it was impossible to get out of his grip. Jaeho turned his little mouse into a ragdoll, using his hands and feet on his skin as he pleased. He wished for it to be over, for him to be in Taehyun’s arms again and to feel safe. It felt like years ago that he’d last seen him, his face had turned blurry in his imagination. Never really there. Almost like a constant reminder of what he’d done. With one final blow to Beomgyu’s face, throwing his head back into the brick wall, he was put out of his misery.</p><p> </p><p>__________</p><p> </p><p>No one could’ve anticipated that someone would be living in the old abandoned warehouses near the city. And neither would anyone have guessed that someone would want to live there. It wasn’t exactly a particularly homey place. It was dark, cold and smelled of metal. Not very ideal for living people. But then again, Kim Jaeho never really cared about where he lived. Especially not recently. For he cared only about one thing, reclaiming what was his.</p><p>Gravel crunched under Taehyun’s feet as he sprinted towards the old building. The roads were wet from the rain, and caused dirty water droplets to fly when his feet met the ground. His lungs felt as though they were going to give out any time now. His breathing was rough and made him struggle to keep going. But his mind was set, he had to find Beomgyu. He had to…</p><p>A bit farther in between two of the huge buildings, there was a door and a big garage door next to it. They were surrounded by a bunch of boxes and a big forklift. He supposed it used to be a loading dock for the warehouse. Taehyun went closer to the door and tried to open it, but it was locked. He could hear a slight jingle from the other side, as though something was hanging onto the handle. </p><p>He searched with his eyes for another way in, but the rain limited his vision. Tae walked towards the boxes in hopes to find a tool or something that he could use to pry the door open. Instead, he noticed that the garage door he’d seen earlier, stood slightly ajar. Just enough space to crawl through. “Perfect..”</p><p>Taehyun hurried through the opening, pressing his already soaked body into the dirty rain water. He looked around the room he’d entered. It was extremely dark, the only light came from outside. He reached into his back pocket and drew out his phone, turning on his flashlight. Tae directed the light towards the inside of the door and, just as he’d anticipated, it was chained shut. </p><p>The light in his hand shook slightly as he crept through the dark of the abandoned building. He didn’t want to make too much noise, in case Jaeho could hear him. He needed to find Beomgyu first. And he needed to find him fast. Although he was doing everything to move as quietly as he could, his footsteps echoed through the vast empty space. </p><p>Taehyun spotted a soft light emitting through a tiny doorway a few metres away. He fastened his pace, curiosity and worry taking over at the slightest sign of life. The door led into another big empty room, except this one had  a chair placed in the middle. A spotlight sat on the floor, directed right at the drooping head of the person sitting in it. Tae had found him. Taehyun dropped everything he was carrying, except for the only source of light he had, in one swift motion and sprinted towards his first real love. Not bothering to check if the room was empty besides the two of them. </p><p>In only a few seconds he’d reached the chair where Beomgyu sat, chained to it. Tae reached for Beomgyu’s head which was hanging forward, as though he was sleeping. In a haze Tae frantically checked to see if Beom had a pulse, if he was breathing. He felt his own pulse rise by the second. Relief washed over him as he felt the faint thumps of his heart and the soft breath hitting his cheek. </p><p>“Beomgyu? Please wake up..” Taehyun grasped Beomgyu’s shoulders and shook him lightly. He stirred, raising his head to see what was going on. Having no idea of where he was or how he’d gotten there.</p><p>“Tae..?” Beomgyu locked eyes with Taehyun and saw the panicked expression on his face. He felt as though someone was playing with a drill inside his brain. Beom remembered being beaten up by the psycho, hitting his head on a brick wall. He must not be in very good shape, he thought.</p><p>“Beomgyu! Oh thank god!” Tae frantically grabbed onto Beomgyu’s torso and looked him in the eyes. Seeming to have forgotten about the possible threat lurking nearby. “I was so scared of losing you…. I’m gonna get you out of here, okay?”</p><p>“Tae you shouldn’t be here.. Jaeho could come back any minute” Fear settled in as Beomgyu realised what he’d caused. His body began shaking again, he couldn’t think straight. They were both in danger, Tae was in danger.  “He has a knife Taehyun..”</p><p>“I’m not leaving you. I promise. We’re getting out of here together.”</p><p> Tae stood up and searched for a way to untie Beomgyu from the chair. It made a terribly loud noise as he fumbled around with the chain. It was no use. The chain had a lock on it, and Tae would not be able to bend metal with his bare hands. A nasty feeling grew in his stomach, as though they were being watched. But there was no one else in the room, it was too dark to tell anyway. Taehyun pulled out his phone and called the police. At least someone would know they’re there. </p><p>“112 what’s your emergency?”</p><p>“My friend was kidnapped, please hurry to this address the perpetrator may still be he—“</p><p>“Sir?”</p><p>Taehyun could not finish the sentence. Jaeho had crept up behind him out of the dark and swung a metal rod at the back of his head. Tae was thrust to the ground, his phone flying out of his hand and landing a few metres away from them.</p><p>“Taehyun! No!” Beomgyu screamed at the scene happening in front of him. He thrashed around in his chair, trying to break free from the chains. “Jaeho stop! Please stop!” Desperate wails escaped him as he struggled, tears streamed down his cheeks.</p><p>Taehyun was on the ground with Jaeho on top of him. He was pounding on him, throwing punch after punch to his face. Tae couldn’t take it, his head flopped to the side and his limbs went still. Jaeho glanced towards Beomgyu, smirking at him as he watched the pathetic little boy cry and scream for him to stop. And so he reached into his pocket and grasped the handle of the shiny blade.</p><p>“Jaeho no, please no! Stop!!” Beomgyu saw the silver glittering in the spotlight. He felt useless, this was all his fault. Taehyun would’ve never come here and he would still be safe if it weren’t for Beomgyu. “Taehyun!”</p><p>His whole body went cold. He’d done it. Jaeho had lodged the knife in Taehyun’s stomach. Beomgyu felt as though everything was closing up on him, he couldn’t breathe. His chest ached with an exploding pain. The only thing he could see was the boy he loved, dying in front of him. And he could do nothing.</p><p>“You should’ve never left me, now see what you did” Jaeho grabbed Beomgyu’s chin fiercely and forced him to look at Tae’s limp body. A pool of blood had formed under him, growing by the second. Beomgyu felt like he was about to throw up. He couldn’t take it anymore, he just wished for it all to be over.</p><p>An ear splitting sound came from the room opposite him. Heavy footsteps echoed through the dark building. Lights flashed in the doorway along with many different voices. There were people there, maybe they’d come to rescue them. </p><p>“Damn it..” Jaeho backed away into the shadows once more. Not wishing to be caught. Beomgyu was left alone with Tae, unconscious, on the floor. Tears streamed down his face as reality came crashing down on him. Taehyun was dying. And it was all his fault.</p><p> </p><p>__________</p><p> </p><p>The constant tone rang out in Taehyun’s head. Always the same, never wavering and never slowing down it’s pace. He’d become accustomed to it, like it's always been a part of him. He just hadn’t been able to hear it before. It comforted him somehow. As though it was proof of his existence, that he was alive. Although he didn’t know where the sound came from. Where was he? </p><p>Tae tried shifting in his lying position, causing immense pain to fall upon his lower stomach. He winced at the sudden sting to his body, slowly opening his eyes. He was lying in a hospital bed, bright lights shone down upon him from the ceiling. The air smelled of disinfectant and rubber. Well, at least he hadn’t died, things could have been much worse. Speaking of which, what had happened to Beomgyu? He was okay too right?</p><p>The room was small and rectangular. The door was green and had a tiny window on the top part of it, covered with a white curtain. Beside the door stood a few counters with miscellaneous medical equipment. Latex gloves, hand sanitizer, tubes and what looked like an empty plastic bag. The bag had remnants of a red substance he guessed to be blood. Taehyun looked over to his left where, as he’d supposed, there stood a metal blood hanger. Another of those plastic bags hung on one of it’s hooks, this one containing more of the red liquid. It had tubes that connected into his left arm, secured around the bend of his arm.</p><p>As he took another glance upon the room, trying to figure out what day it was and how long he’d been there. He noticed someone was sitting right beside his bed, leaning their head upon the mattress. The person was snoring softly, breathing in and out unevenly. Tae could recognise those dark locks anywhere. It was Beomgyu. Taehyun’s senses seemed to be waking up again, regaining their abilities. For he now saw that their hands were intertwined, something he was sure he would’ve noticed earlier. A million questions rose up inside Taehyun’s mind, threatening to boil over. How long had Beomgyu been there? Why was he there? Is he alright? What had happened...</p><p>Whatever the reason to him being there was, Taehyun was grateful. He felt warmer knowing his friend was by his side. Even considering what had come between the two of them. Tae allowed himself to enjoy this moment, to enjoy Beomgyu’s presence. He allowed himself to enjoy their skin touching once more. Relishing the feeling, before it was stripped away from him again. How long this moment would last, he did not know. But it didn’t matter. His only concern was that Beom was safe and away from that psycho. Taehyun would protect him, even if they could never share a relationship the way he wanted to. Even if Tae was forced to watch Beomgyu fall in love with someone else. He would make sure he was happy. If that so happened to mean a life without himself in it, then so be it.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Okay so, I once again apologise for my hiatus, this time much longer than I expected. I needed to take some time for myself and just focus on my well being. Thank you all for being patient and for the support, you guys inspire me to continue writing🥺<br/>And I also apologise for leaving you all right after a cliffhanger lmao, wasn’t planned but kinda funny 😅</p><p>Also, I started dating someone :D<br/>(not that you’d want to know but 🤷)</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So uh, Idk what to put here but I hope you liked it. I don't think the future chapters will be as long, but I had to make the first chapter into two chapters because otherwise it would've been twice as long. I'll try updating regularly</p></blockquote></div></div>
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